Invisible
by Aikido Kiryuu
Summary: Midori is a depressed, lonely girl who always seems to be at the center of trouble. As her life continues on an uncertain, rocky path, she isn't so sure she wants to live anymore. Can Zero bring the girl no one sees out of her living nightmare? ZeroxOC
1. Watch Me Disappear

"Midori-chan?" I only half heard Yuuki, my new friend at Cross Academy. She was a little too enthusiastic, but I didn't really think about it too much. She was a person, and she talked to me. In the long run, wasn't that all that mattered? I'm no good with people skills, so I should warn you about that straight-forward. I combed my fingers forcefully through my raven hair. It hurt, just a little…I accidentally tore some of my hair out. Oops.

"Hmm…?" I asked, coming back down to earth. My head was in the clouds quite often, actually. I stared at her with a blank look on my face. That's right. We were on Guardian duty. I'd almost forgotten, in my lack of acceptance of reality. Fantasy was better. Why doesn't everyone live in a fantasy world? There…everything's so perfect… So I live off in my own little fantasy world, where I could be liked and adored. Instead of hated and laughed at.

But…technically if people dislike you…eventually it gets to that point where almost everyone dislikes you…so…in the end wouldn't that make you popular? On the other end of the spectrum, clearly, but everyone would know you at least. At least you aren't invisible. But…then how can someone be hated and invisible at the same time, like I clearly am. Watch me disappear. Just watch me fade into your background…

Little do they all know that I'm secretly rooting my impression into them…and soon, they'll all remember my name. They'll remember the girl who sat in the corner alone. They'll wish they were nicer to me. They'll cry and ask why they never talked to me. "Why did we make fun of Midori-chan?" And I won't accept their apologies, even in Hell.

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against

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First Chappie!! :D Tell me how you like it!! Click on the pretty review button!! Come on, do it!!

Oh yeah also I don't own vampire knight


	2. What Makes Us Human

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against

Rise Against is almost always my inspiration. *-*

I don't own Vampire Knight.

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Blood. Blood is whatever you claim that it is. Life source, yes. Disgusting, no. Red, sometimes. Only sometimes. Blood can be all different sorts of colors…red, blue…whatever. My blood is red. Or so it appears. Isn't that normal though? I've never actually seen the blood of another person, so I can't be entirely sure. But people always seem to portray it as red…so I guess that's just the assumption that I will have to go on.

My blood is still red, today, as it always has been. I've checked. To make sure that my blood was still red. That my blood was still normal. But is there anything about me that's normal? I think not…

I won't be missed.

I will be grieved for.

But I will not be missed.

They will wish that they were nicer to Midori-chan, of course, but…

They will not miss me.

I will die, all alone, bleeding to death. I don't think that that's normal either. No, I thought that it wasn't. I will be remembered. Isn't that all I've ever wanted? To be remembered? Of course. Because I'm a forgettable type of person. You're paired up with me once for a lab project…and then it is over. You don't remember my name, or my face. I am sitting behind you in the corner, but you don't see me. You've never seen me. But I've always been there…always.

I watch everyone else from a distance. I know all of you. I know your faces, your names, and how you breathe. I study you, so I can feel like I know you. Even though you don't know me. Of course I'm a creep. You would call me that, wouldn't you? Because you don't know me. But I'm alone. And I'm falling- because I'm alone in the world. Because you wouldn't listen to me.

Nobody ever listens to me.

You're scared of me, aren't you?

It's alright.

I'm scared of myself, too.

That's the way it's going to be, until I take my last breath. Tonight.

"Yuuki," I said, half smiling on the deed I was contemplating. "I'm going to go back to my room now. Okay? I'm not feeling so good." A small flicker of a smirk played about my lips.

"Hm? Okay, Midori-chan. Will you be alright? Should I walk with you?" She asked, kindly enough.

"Believe me. I'll be just fine." I said, before walking off in a way that was almost dance-like. I would be fine. Once everything was over with. Then, and only then, I'd be fine.

I felt her looking after me, her eyes filled with a dull confusion. On the inside, she didn't care for me in the least. That's what I'd been able to make from her strange, awkward reactions towards me. Because she was scared of me, just like everyone else.

Fear is what makes us human.

I hummed softly, and twirled as I walked. A strange movement, I'll admit. But no one was there to watch me. So I did what I wanted to. Twirl, twirl, twirl--TREE! I crashed into a tree in a confused dizzy state. Ouch. The bark had scraped some of my skin. I was bleeding. I smiled, and ignored the pain. Blood was trickling down my hand, and dripping off of my fingers to the ground. Drip. Drip. Drip. I bleed easy. Very easy. There wasn't a lot this time, just a small little stream as thick as a pin that was gone soon. I looked at the sight of the scrape. Ouch…that looked like it must have hurt. I hadn't noticed…how strange.

I turned around to see Kiryu Zero, the other prefect next to Yuuki and I.

I knew about vampires. My parents had been vampires…well, they'd been turned almost directly after I'd been born. I didn't remember them. My grandparents had just told me that they'd died. My grandparents were vampire hunters. I'd gone along with them. They'd even showed me some self defense. That had been interesting…

Anyways, my grandparents had always known I wasn't quite right in the head. They died…just about a month ago. Unexpectedly. In their sleep.

Why are you looking at me like that?


	3. When You're Invisible Who Sees You?

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against.

* * *

"Midori…you're bleeding." Zero commented.

"What do you want Kiryu?" I asked, looking at him. Well, glaring at him was more like it.

His gaze hardened on the small tiny little bit of blood on my hand. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I snorted. "Not like you care."

And with that, I stalked back to my bedroom. My bedroom was indeed the only place where my problems would truly come and spill out over the floor. Like my blood would. Tonight.

Tonight my soul would escape to wherever it is that you go when you die. I presume that I'm going to Hell though. If there was such a thing. I don't think I believe in Heaven. Or Hell, either. But…I don't oppose the idea either. I'm agnostic, more or less. I'll respect your religious views if you respect my lack of faith. If you can't respect my views- well then I give myself full permission to tread all over your faith with scientific facts.

I sat on my floor at the foot of my bed, and took my socks off. I don't know why, but I considered it evil to wear my socks during something like this. I took out the little razor that I kept in my shoe. It was cold and metal, much like I thought of my heart as. Of course my heart wasn't metal, but…it was quite impenetrable. And I wasn't going to let the small thing I had for Zero change that. I snorted to myself as I fingered the little razor in my hands. No one could ever like Midori-chan, of course. Why would they? I was insane, and I use that term lightly. Maybe I wasn't insane.

Maybe I was just lonely.

Because when you're invisible, who sees you? Who hears you? Who holds you? Who even knows that you're there?

I touched the razor to the part of my leg below the knee. And then, what do you think I did? I cut it open…deep and long…all the way to my ankle. I supposed that would get infected. But I didn't really expect to live that long. After all, I was gushing some pretty heavy stuff now.

How long before they smelled it? How long before they were here? How long did I have to die before they could save me? How long? How long was this going to take, anyways? I hoped it would be over soon…I didn't want this to go on much longer…for the pain was unbearable…

I wonder what death is like. Do you know when you're dead? Or does your soul fade before then? How long before you're completely detached? So many questions…so little time to answer them all. Considering that I didn't have much longer left on me anyways. I hummed my favorite song, and it brought my cheer in comfort in my final hour, I must say. Suddenly someone threw my door open, and kneeled down to me. My eyes were shut tight now, and I was too lazy to open them up again. Boy, was I tired!

"Midori! Midori!" Someone was calling my name. Perhaps my grandparents, from their afterlife. I almost chuckled at the thought.

No. This voice was younger…more concerned…Zero? What was he doing?

"What?" I asked, opening one eye to stare at him.

"Who did this to you?" He demanded. Questions…questions…blah blah blah. I didn't care about his questions.

"I did."

He got up to retrieve the Chairman.

"No…" I said sounding rather drunk. "You can't leave me here…" Now I was sounding like a child. But I really didn't want him to leave me here either…gosh…oh…nice….warm fade to black…oh that looks so beautiful… "Don't tell." I managed to get out. Since I might just live through this after all…no one could know. Suicide watch is not a cool thing. Believe me.

"Midori…hang on!" I heard Yuuki's voice then…more pleasant and warm…but she wasn't Zero…she could never be Zero. Obviously. I wanted him with me when I died. Not her…I sighed, and I felt myself slip away…like leaves in a river, I was swept out to a sea that was the color…

Black...


	4. When Almost Isn't Good Enough

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against.

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"I think she's gonna wake up!" I heard the perky voice of Yuuki, laced only with a tinge of tainted worry.

More voices I couldn't understand. I was drifting on a puffy cloud, in and out of my concentration. I flickered my eyes open to meet a bright, bright, unbearable light.

"Turn the lights off…"I tried to say, covering my eyes with a wrist. But my words came out in a mess of jumbled syllables, and I doubted anyone could understand any of it.

"Midori…can you hear me?" Yuuki chirped, and I felt something brush against my wrist.

"No." I managed to get out clearly. Sarcasm. Had to love it.

"Why can't you-" I was almost amused, until she caught my sarcasm, "Midori-chan! This is no time to use that sharp tongue of yours!"

"Now's a good a time as any…" I said, pulling my wrist away, and squinting my eyes in the bright light. Hah. Beat that.

Yuuki didn't have anything to say to that. I smirked.

"Midori, please." Chairman Cross said from somewhere…he sounded far away. "Grow up a little, will you?"

"I will when you do."

I heard someone chuckle once, from nearby. My eyes were still adjusting to the sharp contrast of light. I thought- I wasn't sure- but it sounded like Zero.

"Midori, that's extremely inappropriate behavior-"

"Oh come on, 'daddy.' Midori has been through a lot. Maybe we shouldn't be starting arguments after she almost died," Yuuki said sternly.

Cross sighed. "Of course not."

I tried not to smirk. I could finally see again, and looked around the room slowly.

Almost.

I had ALMOST died.

Well…I supposed that almost was never good enough.

I'd just have to try again.


	5. Well Someone Had To

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against.

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"Come on, Midori-chan!" Yuuki cried excitedly, as she pranced ahead of me. Since my little "episode," Yuuki had been appointed as my overseer. My jailer. And she was also moving into my dorm, for a little over three months. So I wouldn't "try anything." Well, I guess Chairman Cross was smarter than he looked.

"Hn." I said, taking my sweet old time.

She sighed, and stood in place, waiting for me with an impatient look on her face. I picked up my pace a little. Not for her, but I didn't feel like being late for class. The one time I could never be invisible. When I was late. When I caught up, she started off again. "Midori, don't look so glum, eh? This could be fun…it will be just like sleeping over," She smiled at me, however, I knew that she wasn't going to enjoy this herself. I swallowed a lump in my throat, but didn't show my thoughts. I shrugged, bored with her pointless jabber. It only took a split second before she abandoned me, when she caught sight of her friend Yori, or whatever her name was. Oh well.

Yuuki was a poor guardian, specifically over me.

This might be easier than I thought.

I slowly walked along, even as Yuuki disappeared from my sight. I wasn't going to try anything funny for a while. After all, I wanted to gain people's trust of me, first. Let them forget this ever happened before my second attempt. I hummed, and looked down to the bandage that was making my stocking stick out funny. Beneath my black sock, was the cream-colored bandage, and just beneath that, my scar that would last forever.

"Midori." A light, male voice said from behind me.

"What?" I asked, turning around in astonishment. Very rarely did people address me.

"What was that about?" Zero asked, pushing me against a tree gently. His eyes narrowed.

"What?" I asked, playing dumb.

His eyes narrowed even further. "You tried to kill yourself."

I glared back at him. "Like you haven't?"

He looked away from me. "Why did you do it?"

"Why did you?"

"That's none of your concern." He said slowly, as if the words were being squeezed out of him like that last bit of toothpaste from the tube that you just can't seem to get out.

"Here's a better question, Kiryuu," I began, staring at him, and slowly absorbing his attractive features. "Why did you just admit to it?"

He sighed in frustration, and released me from the tree. "Why are you always so damn impossible about everything, Midori?"

"Because you thought it would be okay to stick your nose into my business." I shrugged, before starting my walk to class again. "Now, we're going to be late, if you don't hurry it up, Kiryuu."

He trailed slowly behind me, and I stopped for a moment to allow him the chance to catch up.

"Where's Yuuki?" He asked suddenly.

I knew it was wrong to dislike Yuuki because Zero had a kind of thing for her, but I was…awfully jealous of her, that was for sure.

"Why do you ask?" I said, pretending to be intensely concentrated on my destination. I wouldn't look at him.

"Isn't she supposed to be with you?"

"She got bored." I stated simply. He really wasn't worth my time.

"Why am I not surprised?"

"Well, gee, Kiryuu, don't ask me." I gave him a meaningful glare before purposely taking long, large strides ahead of him.

He clearly wasn't used to someone, a girl nonetheless, telling him off.

Hey, well someone had to.

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Don't worry, the story will pick up soon...I know it seems like its going nowhere now, but its going to pick up.

Reviewww 33 :3


	6. I Was Wet

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you who's, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against.

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They don't know what it is about me that makes them afraid of me. Something about me intimidates them, and they just can't put their finger on it. They prefer not seeing me at all, because they fear me. I'm pretty harmless to others, but there's something else…that's distancing me from them.

When I walk into a room, everyone's happiness is sucked from them, should they notice me. I don't know what it is about me, but that's what has always happened to me. Eventually, I got used to it. If I was destined to be a loner, hey, I was fine with that. I was self-sufficient enough. I thought of myself as a pretty good friend…to myself. Sometimes, I admit, I will talk to myself, out of loneliness. I know, I'm mad, but…it comforts me to know that someone is listening. Even if that someone is myself.

I found myself wandering around aimlessly away from campus, in the dark woods nonetheless, with no moon in sight. It was hidden by licorice-colored clouds. Which made me think of licorice cotton candy. Which in turn, made me want to gag. I twirled around, feeling chilly air invade underneath my uniform skirt. My slight limp made this action awkward, but do you honestly think I cared? Of course not. I fell down, on purpose, to my butt, and leaned back on my hands, looking up at the sky. Most of the stars were hidden by my "licorice cotton candy" clouds. It appeared to promise rain. I found myself laughing giddily, for no reason whatsoever. I fell back to my back, exhausted. I slowly began to fall asleep…I was humming a song, at which the name escaped me in my half-awake state. All I knew was that it was a song. And it was a song I was very familiar with…perhaps it was a simple children's song.

I fell asleep…

I awoke to rain hammering me down in the ground. It was pouring. I shut my eyes against the rain, and stood up. I was dripping wet, and there was no way that my uniform would be dry before tomorrow. Well…I wasn't getting any wetter. My hair clung to my face, and fell down in wet locks. I began to walk back in the direction that I assumed I'd came from.

Soon enough, I found myself back at my dorm. I went into the Chairman's bathroom, along with some dry pajamas. I searched in the closet for Yuuki's hairdryer, and I studied it carefully. I'd never had to use one before. I knew how it worked, but I preferred to let my hair dry naturally. I stripped off my soggy uniform, and hung each piece separately and spread out over the side of the bathtub. Then, I got into my pajamas, which were simple gray flannel pants and a tank top, and then hesitantly plugged in the hairdryer. I didn't really care about what my uniform would look like for tomorrow, but I'd rather go in it dry then wet. Besides, one of the teachers might find it in their interest to yell at me. Just because they were in a bad mood.

I flicked on the hairdryer, and began working on drying off my uniform. The entire thing wouldn't become dry, because I wouldn't have the patience. But at least if I got it halfway there, the rest could dry overnight. I squatted down on the floor, and began the toilsome work.

I began humming the same song I'd been humming earlier, and when I listened in to myself, I realized I had no idea what exactly the song was. Whatever. I continued to hum and blow-dry my uniform, but of course, I'd be interrupted.

Yuuki burst into the door. "Midori-chan?! Where have you been? We've been looking everywhere for you!" I flicked off the hairdryer irritated. "What are you doing??" She asked, puzzled.

"I was wet," I said simply, glaring at her and turning on the hairdryer once again. It drowned out her annoying voice.

She said something else, but I didn't hear it, and I said, rather overdramatically, "I CAN'T HEAR YOU."

She walked over to me, not wanting to take my crap right now, and instead of going to me, she just unplugged the hairdryer. Smart girl. I would have had her arm twisted behind her back in a second, had she gone straight to me.

"Hn." I glared at her, picked up my uniform in my arms, and walked out of the bathroom. "Oh well," I said, in a singsong voice.

God, that girl needed to grow up.


	7. Wrong

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you whose, is worse"

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against.

* * *

I yawned, and tapped my pencil against the desk in my dorm room. Why did writing essays have to be so boring? My stomach was growling at me, as it had been for the past few hours. But this essay needed to be done with before I even considered eating. I glanced out the window, and watched the rain fall. It was pouring out. As I wrote the last sentence, a smile flicked across my face. The smile was killed and stabbed over and over repeatedly to a violent and painful death when someone knocked on my door.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

"Yes?" I asked, slipping the essay into the front cover of my History book.

"Midori?" Yuuki asked, opening the door with the key she'd been given ever since my incident.

I sucked in air through my teeth. "What?" I whirled around in my chair.

Just in my presence, Yuuki lost her perk.

Maybe that's because I forgot to tell you something.

I'm an energy vampire. Instead of feeding off of blood, (I, anyways) fed off of others' happiness. All energy vampires are slightly different, but I fed on peoples happiness and securities. It isn't like I do it on purpose though, I can't help it. That's why people always stayed away from me. They were naturally turned away from me on their instincts. I felt bad about it, but at the same time, I didn't. Kiryuu Zero was the only person I knew who went unaffected by it, because he didn't really have any happiness and security to begin with, so he really didn't notice my difference all that much.

"I was just…um, checking on you. You know, like I'm supposed to." Yuuki said, drawing a circle on my carpet with her foot.

"Well I was finishing up my History essay, so you can leave now." My eyes narrowed. I really, really didn't want her in my room. I wanted her to go away. And not come back.

"Are you okay?" She asked, swallowing her instinctive fear of me.

"I'm fine, Yuuki. Now please leave me alone." I said, giving her my most meaningful glare.

"Of course…I was just….yeah." She twirled a piece of hair around one of her fingers.

"Yes, I know what you were doing. Now please leave." I pointed to my door.

She didn't respond, flicked her hair behind her head as a nervous thing, and left, closing my door softly. I heard her talking to someone just outside of my door, and I got a little curious.

I pranced over to my door on silent feet, and bent to my knees and pressed my ear against the door. I stared at the carpet, focusing intently on the voices. Why? Because they were probably talking about me. And I felt like I had some type of right to know what they were saying about me.

"There's something about her that scares the crap out of me," Yuuki continued from whatever she'd said before.

"I think you're overreacting," said a bored-sounding Zero.

"You ALWAYS think that, Zero…" Yuuki said lowering her voice after realizing how loud she'd gotten.

"I don't get what you find so scary about her besides the fact that she isn't very nice. But, I can't say I enjoy being nice to you either."

I tried very, very hard not to laugh. But it was difficult and I covered my mouth just in case.

"It's not that she isn't nice," Yuuki took in a deep breath. "She's been through a lot, people don't like her, so I can understand that. It's something else. Something about her is wrong." Yuuki's voice was getting rather shrill now, and louder.

"She can hear you," Zero said matter-o-factly. "She's heard every word of this."

"What?" Yuuki sounded shocked. Not so much the fact I was listening, but the fact that I knew that.

"How do you know that?" Yuuki asked, disgusted.

"Because you're being very loud."

But that wasn't it. Zero was hiding something else, I could tell by the swiftness and defensiveness in his answer. There was something else.


	8. A Hidden Desire

"Midori, can I talk to you?" Yuuki asked, running up beside me as I was walking back to my dorm.

"Hm. Let me think….no," I said bluntly, brushing her off.

She wasn't happy about that one bit. "Can I ask you a question?"

"No," I insisted, hoping she'd take the hint and go away. I was so tired of all of this, and I just wanted her to go away.

She sighed. "I'm not going to leave you alone until you answer this."

Oh. That was good… "Fine!" I grunted, ready to punch her in the face. "What the frick do you want?"

She looked a little astonished at my random bout of anger. I had no patience for her right now. "I…oh just forget it. If you want to wind up alone, be my guest. It really isn't my problem, okay?" She walked away, but her words kept repeating themselves in my head, over and over again…like a CD that had a scratch and would always catch on that certain place until you skipped to the next song.

_**If you want to wind up alone…**_

I don't know why those words bothered me. They shouldn't have, because I hated being around people. And people hated being around me. That was just the way things worked…

But there was still a part of me that didn't want to be alone. There was a part of me that did want people in my life. There was a part of me that wanted someone to care if I lived or died. And I was kind of surprised at how much bigger that part was getting…

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Sorry this one was super short. I'll TRY my hardest to get another chapter up today, because this chapter was so short. But I beg of you, review review review. I like hearing what people have to say about this...I'm sorry I haven't been doing much of anything lately. Its not because I'm lazy, it's because I have writers block right now. As soon as it goes away, I hope to go back to my normal, updating a lot kind of attitude.


	9. Breaking Down

"Let's compare scars, I'll tell you whose, is worse."

~Swing Life Away by Rise Against

* * *

I sighed sickly, knowing I'd have to apologize to Yuuki. Or something along those lines anyways. I wasn't sure how I would go about this task, since…well, I wasn't exactly amazing at apologizing.

But ever since she'd said that…

'…if you want to wind up alone…'

I'd been doing some thinking. Thinking wasn't something I'd done a lot. Well, reflecting. Thinking about my actions. Etcetera, etcetera.

Now that I'd become capable of thinking of my actions…

Well, to put it bluntly, I was a total b-

"Midori?" More intrusion. Zero. Why would he be at my door, anyways?

"What the h-" be nice, Midori, try being more open. I took a deep breath, and walked over to my door. This was like a test. One big exam. That's all this was. Just have to keep my cool…

I opened the door. "Yes, Kiryuu?" I said. I almost smiled, but, then I remembered my smile was creepy.

As much as I WANTED to scare him away.

"Yuuki asked me to talk to you," He looked down and away from me, looking a little upset.

I exhaled. "Then please, come in," -gag, gag- I think I threw up a little in my mouth there…I'm disgusting myself here. "I don't bite. Um…hard."

He looked at me funny.

So much for trying to be funny. "Tough crowd," I grumbled to myself, and offered him the chair in my room. I sat on the end of my bed.

I'd never had an actual BOY in my room before. Well okay, so not exactly a boy. More along the lines of man, guy, something. I wasn't about to check if my gender guess was correct, but I was pretty darn sure.

He took a deep breath. "Yuuki's worried about you."

"So?"

No answer.

I realized that might have sounded a little harsh, so I tried to soften it a little bit, "Okay, so maybe that was a little-"

"Harsh? Mean? Someone's actually worried about you, and you're just too full of yourself to let her help," Zero's eyes narrowed. I'd made him upset. When it concerned Yuuki, he was suddenly Mr. Don't hurt her.

"You aren't making me feel any better," I whispered softly, staring at the ground. Was I actually sorry? Feeling guilty?

"My job wasn't to make you feel better, Midori. It was to talk to you," neither of us wanted to make eye contact.

My eyes were watering.

"Just shut up already!" I raised my voice, "You think I want to be this way? I know I act all tough and scary on the outside but I'm breaking down bit by bit on the inside!" Two fat tears rolled down my cheeks. My voice was quivering, "The only reason I'm this way is because I'm afraid of getting close to people!" And my voice broke, making it apparent I was crying, if he hadn't already known.

He looked shocked. As if he always knew it, but never thought he'd hear me say it.

Whoops.

I think I just spilled my heart out.

There goes my cover.

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Review please. =) Sorry this took so long to get out…Happy New Year!! This was supposed to be for Christmas, but…I forgot.


	10. Melting Point

I tried to ignore Kiryuu and Yuuki as much as possible after my little episode. Well, so not ignore them. That would go against my whole 'be a better person' thing. More like…avoiding them. Yeah…that's the word. I would just disappear into thin air. Poof. Well, not exactly. More like hide behind trees or trashcans or whatever else. Not being a bitch was hard work, let me tell you.

Of course, my little hiding plan wasn't going to work forever. Maybe a few weeks. At most. However, my luck never holds out that long. If you haven't noticed. More than likely, I might be able to go a few days at the most. Kiryuu I could hide from, aside from in class. But class doesn't exactly count. Although I can tell he'd been more curious about me lately. From the look he gave me sometimes, I could read so much from his face, and yet I could never get the whole picture. It was like reading a story by a terrible author (cough, cough AikidoKiryuu cough, cough). You could read and read and it would never get anywhere. He had questions about me, yet he obviously wasn't going to dig any deeper than he already had. Yet. He'd already dug down deep enough to make me upset. Deep enough for his shovel to tap against my pipelines that made me cry. Now the only thing that's getting deep is my metaphor.

I couldn't be sure about what he was really thinking though. I couldn't look at him long enough, without it being weird, to read deeper into him, either.

And most importantly, I couldn't be sure why I even questioned his questions. Why I even cared what he thought of me, or why I even bothered to waste my brain power pondering this instead of taking an exam.

I hurried back to my dorm room, darting from hiding place to hiding place like a nervous beetle afraid of getting squashed. Each time I hid behind a tree or something, I'd look around carefully, scanning the area for Yuuki or Zero. I darted behind a tree, ignoring some of the strange looks I got from Day Class girls. They were giggling at me. Laughing at me. Me. I wanted to attack them, pull their hair out, and shove them in the mud. But I took a deep breath, and I didn't even bother acknowledging their presence. The old Midori would have done those things. The old Midori would have yelled at them and beat them up until they ran away crying. That's what third grade bully Midori would have done. I simply scowled to myself.

Someone grabbed my shoulder. I whirled around, almost tempted to bite the hand that touched me.

Kiryuu. Oh great.

"Would you stop making a fool of yourself? It's embarrassing just watching you, really. You look like an idiot, hiding behind trees like that. You clearly aren't very good at it."

"Would you please go away?" My eyes narrowed. I might be trying to be a better person now, but no way was I letting that little comment fly.

He ignored me. "You aren't invisible, Midori. I've been able to see you every time you thought you were so cleverly hiding."

"Why are you even bothering talking to me?" I asked, calming myself down.

"I told you. I'm embarrassed by watching you try to hide. Now just cut it out and try to be normal, will you?"

I cracked a smile, "Me? Normal? You have a better chance of a snowball in Hell."

He shook his head, sighing. "Whatever. Just stop hiding. Yuuki almost died of laughter when she saw you hiding like this."

And then he walked away.

But somehow, deep, deep down…I felt that layer of ice I'd carefully shaped and frozen around my heart melting away.

* * *

I am so, so sorry! Writers block is still tormenting me, and I've spent countless nights staring at a blank word document…I had to push and squeeze my brain as hard as I could just to get this much. But I'm not dead, so don't worry… well, anyways, if you've been patient enough to keep bothering with my story, please review.


	11. Changes

That night I woke up and found sweat covering every inch of my body. Except I was freezing cold, and I was shivering. I couldn't remember what woke me up, but I wasn't sure if I could get back to sleep. I glanced around my room, and carefully got out of bed. I pulled an elastic off of my wrist, and tied back my hair. I silently opened my door, and crept down the hallway as quietly as I possibly could. I was still stuck in one of the Chairman's guest rooms. I apparently still couldn't be trusted enough to live in the regular dorms yet. I slipped in to the chairman's bathroom, and turned on the sink. Gently, I rubbed down the back of my neck and face with cool water. When I put the washcloth in the dirty towel bin, I looked at myself in the mirror. And for the first time in my life, I really looked at myself.

My hair was in my eyes, and my eyes looked black. My skin was pasty and pale, and my pajamas were just as black as my hair. In the end, I looked scary. Which was what I wanted, right? I had once thought so, but looking at myself just then, at 3 A.M., I wasn't so sure if that's what I wanted anymore. There was some tiny ounce of girlishness in me, no matter how sick and underused it was, and it was breaking out and performing mutiny on the rest of my brain. Something in me wanted to be pretty. Or were my dreams just blending into my reality because it was so far into my sleep?

I experimented. I pushed my bangs out of my eyes, and held them back with my hands. Something was changing. I cocked my head, and tried to figure out who the new girl was, staring back at me. Whoever she was, she was gone in an instant. Someone opened the door, and on instinct, I let my bangs fall back into place.

"What are you doing awake, Midori…?" The Chairman stared at me like I had three heads. I couldn't help staring back. It was hard not to stare when he was wearing bunny slippers.

"Uh….Um…I just woke up. I had to go to the bathroom is all." I quickly flushed the toilet for effect. "Sorry I woke you up."

I ran as fast as I could to my room, trying to understand what was going on with me. Playing with my hair? Saying sorry? Worrying about appearance? I was sick.

The next morning, I weakly crawled out of bed. After I had woken up, I hadn't gotten back to sleep for another two hours. And I was completely exhausted because of it. Looking at the clock, I noticed that I had to get changed. Fast. So I got dressed into my uniform as fast as I could, and then looked in the mirror. I brushed through my hair until it looked like silk. I ran my hands through it, enjoying its texture. I gently picked up a headband I normally used when I washed my face, and used it to push my bangs out of my face. I looked different. Pretty, even. But I felt awkward. It was too different. Besides. Did I really want to draw attention to myself? Not really. I was about to lift my hands up and take off the silly thing, when Yuuki burst into my room. Talk about no respect for privacy.

"C'mon, Midori! The Chairman told me to come and get you. He said you were acting weird last night, so he wanted me to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine. I can handle my-" She grabbed my arm with one hand, my book bag with the other, and started tugging me alone.

"Yuuki!" I cried, "I can walk just fine!"

She paused, and let go of me. And then she noticed that I was wearing my hair differently. "Oh my gosh! Look at you! There was a girl under there all this time!"

I glared at her, not sure whether to be insulted or flattered. Either way, I didn't like the way she was gawking at me. I ripped of the headband, and straightened out my bangs again, letting them hang in my eyes.

"Why did you-"

"Drop it. Just forget about it, okay?" I slung my book bag over my shoulder, and stalked off ahead of her.

"Midori…w-wait up, will you?" She asked, hurrying after me. "What did I say?"

I stopped and turned around. "You didn't say anything. It has nothing to do with you, okay? I just don't like attention. So just shut up and leave me alone you annoying-"

I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. "Midori. Calm down. As much fun as it is watching you blow up at Yuuki, people are staring." It was…Kiryu. Why was he…?

He took my arm and led me away from Yuuki, towards our first class.

"Why are you helping me?" I narrowed my eyes, wondering why he felt sorry for me. It was annoying, and I hated people's pity.

"That doesn't matter. But you really do need to keep yourself under control. Yuuki is…sensitive."

"Oh. So. THAT'S what this is about. You just can't stand the fact that I might hurt your precious Yuuki's feelings!" I pulled my arm away from him. "Well you can't protect her from every little hurt that might come her way, buddy. I might be rude and mean, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to turn around and kill her or something! What's the matter with you anyways? You hurt her all of the time, and you expect me not to do it on occasion, too? You're just such a big hypocrite, you know that??" I was yelling now. I backed away from him.

I had hit a nerve somewhere, because he flinched quickly, but not after returning to returning to his normal, stone-cold self.

"Don't be stupid, Midori. You're upset and don't know what you're saying. Calm down and try talking to me again when you're sane, would you?"

I blinked, suddenly feeling all of the color and anger drain out of me. What had just happened to me? I fell to the concrete ground, feeling confused and upset. "I…I'm sorry…I don't…know what…"

I shook my head, trying to get a grip.

"Come on Midori. Get up," Zero ordered, holding out a hand. "I know what it's like to be angry and upset, but you don't have to take it out on other people."

I pushed his hand away, and stood up by myself. Quietly, I whispered, "Let's go to class now." Everyone was staring, but I tried to push them all away. A few glares each way seemed to effectively make them go about their own business, and slowly the silence turned into quiet, awkward chatter. Eventually all of the tension went away, and there was the normal, loud noise that all normal schools provided.

After all of our classes were over, Zero walked with me, almost like he was guarding everyone else from me. Or maybe he was guarding me from myself.

"Someone need some anger management classes?" A boy sneered.

I opened my mouth and whirled around to face him, and I was about to let out a string of very nasty words. But Zero squeezed my shoulder with a pretty strong force, and I remembered to brush it off. I don't know how I kept my head, or even how it worked. But for whatever reason, Kiryu had a type of calming effect on me. So I let it go. Even when I heard laughter from bubbly girls, or loud, obnoxious laughing and pointing from big and stupid brawn-no-brains type of guys.

No matter who it was, everyone seemed to have a reason to not like Midori. And for once, I honestly didn't care. I didn't care who stared at me, or who laughed at, or who taunted me. It was easier to just concentrate on Zero, focus on how he acted. It was much easier to just focus on the one person who somehow didn't make me feel like life would be better if I was dead. The only thing I had to do was keep my head clear, and think up reasons to stay alive.

"Well if it isn't Midori and Zero," Jet, one of the school baboons- I mean- jocks stood in front of us, blocking the way. "School outcasts finally hook up, eh?"

"No," I snapped quickly, glaring at him.

"Oh I see…so was he the only one tough enough to keep you in line and escort you to the police?" Jet smirked, determined to tick me off.

"Well obviously, since you could never do it." I was trying to keep my cool, and just use sarcasm for now, and hopefully make him leave me alone.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jet clenched his teeth together, and grabbed me by the front of the shirt.

"It means that I don't think that you're as tough as you think you are. In fact, I think it's all just an act," I said calmly.

"You wanna start something, Midori?" He glared at me, and pulled me closer to him.

"You wouldn't hit a girl," I sneered, stepping on his foot.

"I wouldn't be hitting a girl. I'd be hitting a future criminal. I'd be doing this world a favor."

By now, a huge crowd had gathered around us. But no matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to throw the first punch. I just couldn't do it.

"Be careful, Midori," Zero warned. I had the strangest feeling that he would be willing to help if a fight started. But only IF. He wasn't about to start a fight, and he didn't need one with Jet. And something told me he'd prefer it if I didn't start a fight either.

"Okay, Jet, fine."

"Fine what?" Jet growled.

"Fine. Just let go of me, and leave me alone." I said, as calmly as possible. The crowd around us burst into shocked whisper. I couldn't believe it, but they were actually surprised that I wasn't going to start a fight. And sure, a week ago, I probably would have started the fight. I would have pounded the daylights out of this guy and not given it a second thought. But something had changed.

"What are you trying to pull?" Jet held my tighter. He didn't believe me. I panicked a little bit.

"I'm not trying to pull anything, Jet," I said, going against all of my urges to hurt him. "Now please, just let me go."

"Why? So I can turn around only to have you attack me?" Woah. Someone had some major trust issues. Not that I could blame him, really.

"I'm not going to attack you!" I cried, desperate to get away from the loser.

"Well…that's too bad."

And then he punched me in the face, making me regret I hadn't landed a blow on him first. And the crowd erupted into cheers. Jet was just smiling and laughing. But I wasn't sure I wanted to fight back.

"Why don't you fight back, emo girl?" He laughed, kicking me while I was down. Literally, and figuratively. I gritted my teeth. I wasn't ready to fight yet. The last thing I needed was being watched over after being accused of starting a fight.

All of this was about status. If he took me down in a fight, he'd get status. And a lot of it. But if I didn't fight back, he'd just look like a total jerk. And I'd look like a loser, but that was the least of my problems. People were starting to realize that I wasn't about to fight back, and suddenly the crowd looked extremely worried that they'd all get in trouble for not helping me. I almost wondered why Zero wasn't helping me. Unless…he'd set it all up. But he wasn't even in sight anymore. Gee, thanks for the help. Jet was relentless. He was pulling my hair and punching me and kicking me, and I wasn't even sure that I had a sense of up or down or left or right. I felt liquid running down my cheeks, and I couldn't tell if it was blood, tears, or both.

Now the crowd was looking a little nervous, and some people had just left. They'd just left me to his mercy, not caring. Why couldn't I be invisible now?

"Jet! Chairman's office!" A teacher barked, pulling Jet off of me.

I was crumpled up into a ball on the ground, trying to stay strong. I didn't want to let on that I was bleeding, or crying, or anything else. I wanted to be remembered as the girl who took it like a soldier. Not the girl who panicked at a little blood and salt waters. The crowd quickly dispersed, leaving the nurse bending over me.

"Midori? Can you hear me Hun?" She asked gently, gently pulling one of my arms away from my face. I looked at her, but for once I wasn't afraid of losing my honor. I just let her take me to her small, white, quiet office, and bandage up my bleeding, bruised, beaten up self.


	12. And Things Get Worse

The nurse had kept me in her office for a few hours, to be sure that I didn't have any serious trauma to my vital organs. Other than being a little sore, I was fine. Sympathy gifts were pouring in by the barrelful. I was no longer invisible. Instead, I was famous for being the scary girl who everyone was once afraid of, but now felt sorry for. No one was scared of me anymore, everyone was sorry they'd misjudged me. Everyone was sorry I didn't fight back. But I left them wondering why I didn't fight back. They were all curious, and I now had several not-so-secret admirers.

Of course, there were several people (mostly friends of Jet) who couldn't stand me, or picked on me because I hadn't lived up to their expectations. I was torn. Part of me regretted not stabbing Jet to death, and the other part was smug that he was expelled, and I was innocent. Throughout the past few hours, several brave people had wandered in to voice their opinions of me. From this, I was able to gather that over 50% of the student population, and 100% of the teacher population were against Jet. Perhaps the most interesting visitor I got was Zero.

"I'll never understand you," he said curiously, handing me a bag of chocolates, "Yuuki asked me to bring you this, by the way."

"Just put it with the other crap," I sighed. Pretty soon I'd have to ask the nurse for some more painkillers. "And good. I don't aim to be understood. I tend to gravitate towards keeping to myself and holding everything inside."

"I've noticed. But answer me this. Why didn't you fight back?" His voice was full of genuine curiosity. He was seriously shocked that I hadn't fought back. I wasn't sure whether to be insulted or flattered.

"What makes you think I could have?" I unwrapped a piece of chocolate and popped it in my mouth, "Just because a lot of people are afraid of me doesn't mean I'm dangerous."

"The way you have trouble controlling your anger sometimes…I would have expected you to at least struggle."

I swallowed the chocolate. "I'm antisocial, alright? That doesn't make me a violent psychopathic moron like Jet. I have enough problems already. And now everyone knows my name. Now everyone feels sorry for me and I hate it. But fighting back would have meant suspension, at least. Fighting back wouldn't have been worth it." But really, I wasn't so sure I could have taken Jet down in a fight. "Now, don't you have some guardian duties to attend to?"

"Yeah. So? Yuuki seems to handle it pretty well."

"Won't she be pissed at you for ditching her again?" I emphasized again.

"I don't care."

"Which reminds me…why did you leave when Jet started attacking me?"

"That isn't important," Zero shook his head.

"I thought your job was to protect the Day Class students. Well I'm a Day Class student," I argued, giving him the hardest time I possibly could.

"Just let it go. I had to leave. Like I have to leave now," Zero got up and left the room.

Well then. I thought it had been a fair question, but clearly mister high and mighty disagreed, and couldn't grace it with a response.

"Can I leave yet?" I asked the nurse impatiently. I was tired of the scenery. Extremely tired of it.

She checked the clock, "Well, I suppose so. But come right back if you feel any dizziness, lightheadedness…"

I didn't hear what she said after that, I was out of that room so fast.

I returned to my room, completely worn out. Well, the Chairman's guest room, anyways. I was prepared to settle down and fall asleep for the rest of the night. But when I opened the door, I didn't see a nice tidy room and big fluffy bed ready for my sleeping comfort. No. Instead I saw a smashed window, clothes strewn about the room, mattress overturned, and bed sheets hanging out the window. And if that wasn't enough? There was a dead rat on my pillow, too.

I stifled a scream, and held back my urge to gag. I wasn't scared of anything, and screaming certainly wasn't my thing either. But I loved animals, big or small, rat or whale. And seeing a dead one really got me upset. I turned away, and raced out the door and down the hallway. I collided with Yuuki.

"Midori? What's the matter?" She asked, managing to stay upright.

"Someone vandalized my room," I said as calmly as possible. "I can only think that it was one of Jet's pals who was upset that Jet got expelled…"

"Don't worry!" Yuuki said, determined, "I'll go get the Chairman, and until your room's cleaned up…well then I guess you'll just have to stay with Yori and me!" Yuuki gave me a wide smile. She clearly pitied me.

"Oh…great," I tried to smile. But it was hard.

WHY? WHY ME?


	13. Moody Midori

"Here we are! Aren't you glad that the Chairman said it was okay for you to stay with us?" Yuuki asked, putting my suitcase that she'd insisted on carrying at the end of her bed. "You can start unpacking your stuff. Yori and I will go and get you some extra blankets out of the supply closet."

"Right…yeah," I said softly, reaching down to my bag.

Yori, immediately uncomfortable with my presence, was quick to run off after Yuuki. I was left alone in the room. I chose the corner that was far away from the closet, and propped up my two pillows against the wall. Everything else I left in my suitcase, which I placed next to the pillows. Not sure of what else to do, I sat down with my back against the pillows, and looked up at the ceiling.

Why was everything bad happening to me? What had I done that was so wrong, that left me deserving of all of this? As far as I knew, nothing.

Yuuki and Yori returned shortly, carrying a giant mass of blanket. Yuuki dropped it on the floor in front of me, and I jumped to my feet, eager to spread it out and fall asleep. Which was exactly what I did.

Someone was shaking me. I playfully batted the person with a hand, although I was feeling anything but playful. Frankly, I was pretty peeved that someone was trying to wake me up at such an ungodly hour.

"Ugh. What is it?" I groaned, burying my face into a pillow. The first thing I was aware of was that my back was aching from sleeping on the floor.

"Midori? It's me. Yori."

The same Yori that looked absolutely terrified of me earlier? No. That couldn't be right. I was instantly alert, so I sat up to face her. Indeed, it was the same Yori. Despite Old Midori, who was telling me to scream at her and tell her to go back to bed and leave me alone, I sat upright against the wall.

"What's up?" I yawned and rubbed my eyes, feeling a little sorry that she looked so scared of me.

"I think there's something I need to tell you," she said, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. "I think I know who trashed your room."

"I'm listening," I said, intrigued.

"Well you know Jet's girlfriend? The one who exchanged here?" Yori looked really uncomfortable, and her voice had grown as quiet as a whisper.

"You mean Tawny?" I asked, feeling a little queasy.

Yori nodded. "When she heard what happened…when Jet got expelled. She blamed you. She's been storming around all day ever since. It wouldn't be beneath her. But…I don't have proof," Yori said looking down. "And I am really sorry about what happened." She stood up, "I just thought you deserved to know."

"Thanks…" I said, too angry at the stick thin lying little witch named Tawny.

"Mhm…" Yori fell asleep.

The next day I woke up to Yori and Yuuki's excited chatter. They were rustling around, getting dressed, probably. I hesitantly opened my eyes, sat up, yawned, and stretched. Yuuki giggled, and tossed a pillow at my head.

"Your hair looks like it's been through a tornado!"

There was something weird about her actions. She seemed too comfortable around me, as if she felt that I wouldn't bite her head off anymore. It was strange. But, for whatever reason, I was in the spirit now, too. So I threw the pillow back at her. She squealed.

"Okay, Midori-chan. I deserved that." Yuuki ran her fingers through her hair.

"Yeah, you did. You woke me up," I complained.

"You should be glad," Yuuki smiled, pointing at the clock. "Good luck getting ready in five minutes."

My mood darkened again. "Why didn't you wake me up earlier?" I screamed, scrambling up out of my makeshift bed so fast the blankets flew through the air. I slid my skirt on over my pajama pants, pulled on my shirt over my undershirt, and quickly pulled my jacket on. Everything was wrinkled and out of place, but I didn't care. I grabbed my book bag.

"Okay. I'm ready," I groaned.

Yuuki snorted, "Not like that you aren't!" She dropped her bag on her bed, and walked over to me, picking up her brush on the way. "Yori, hold her down!" She ordered.

"What are you-?" Yori gently took my arms, and Yuuki started yanking the brush through my hair until it was flawless. Yori was gently straightening out my clothes. "Stop! This is torture!" I cried.

"Oh stop being such a drama queen," Yuuki rolled her eyes, pulling my hair back into a ponytail. "Today's like your last chance to get a date for the dance."

"What makes you assume I want a date for the dance?" I moaned. Yuuki brushed my long bangs out of my eyes and to the sides of my face. Then she turned me to the mirror.

"See? There's the pretty Midori that likes to hide from us!"

I stared, "I see why she likes to hide. I'm covered in bruises!"

Before I had time to react, Yuuki and Yori dragged me out to class. "Guys, please! Everyone's going to be talking about me already! The last thing I need is people staring at me."

"Oh shut up, would you?" Yuuki said brightly.

"No," I whined. Strange. Midori wasn't a whiner. Just then, I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled my arm away. "I can walk by myself. I don't need you holding my hand!" I stormed off ahead of them.

But for whatever reason, I let the hair stay.

I was sitting out under a tree for lunch, and pretty much everyone had avoided me. Smart. When my dignity was hurting, I wasn't someone that anyone wanted to be around. Yuuki and Yori had gotten a splash in the face when I had brushed them off earlier. My gentleness from earlier had given them a false sense of security. They'd forgotten that I wasn't someone to be messed with, and then they'd realized too late that I was still dangerous. Like mice making friends with a cat. Sometimes forgetting simple social differences could be fatal. They were lucky I wasn't a killer.

People were whispering. People were pointing. But no one had the nerve to come up and speak to me directly. So I was alone with my slice of too-greasy pizza. Girls were running around, squealing about their dates to the dance. Boys were hanging out, bragging about how their date had the nicer body, or whatever. None of those boys were talking about me, though. They were all scared.

"Midori," a familiar voice said from behind me. Zero.

"What do you want?" I asked, not really willing to put up with his crap right now.

"I wanted to apologize. But the more time I spend talking to you the less I want to." He stood in front of me, towering over me. I stared up at him. I felt deflated, like all of my fight had been taken out of me.

"Well?" I asked, placing my pizza crust on my Styrofoam tray.

"Well what?"

"Are you going to apologize, or block my sunlight all lunch?"

He stepped out of the way of the sunlight, and I squinted as it shined right into my eyes.

"Well if that's how you're going to be, I'll just leave." He started to walk away.

I sighed. "Zero, wait."

He stopped and turned around. "Hn?"

"I- I'm sorry for being rude," I quickly picked up my tray, and started walking towards the trashcan.

"Well, now that you're being mature…" He grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. "I'm sorry for leaving you to Jet's mercy. I should have done something." He gently ran a finger across one of the bruises on my cheek, as if thinking something over. "I could have stopped it. But I thought you would have stood up for yourself."

"Between you and me, maybe I'm not as tough as everyone expects me to be." I sighed, and continued walking to the trashcan, disposing of the pizza skeleton.

Wait. What just happened?


	14. A Different Side

When I returned to Yuuki's dorm later that night (with the news that my room wouldn't be cleaned up for at least three days), Yuuki was spinning around with a white dress pressed up to her chest.

"What's that?" I asked, exhausted. I placed my bag down in the corner, watching Yori put on some light makeup and Yuuki dance around like she just was declared queen of the world.

"A dress, duh!" Yuuki said giddily, starting to undress and put it on.

I rolled my eyes, "I can see that, stupid. I meant where did it come from."

"Someone sent it to her," Yori said happily, "A not-so-secret admirer." She winked. I had no idea what she was implying, though.

"Well isn't that just dandy," I said sarcastically, taking out my History book and sitting on the floor to start the assigned reading.

Yuuki had finished pulling the dress over her head, and looked at me. "What are you doing?" She demanded, plucking the book out of my hands and dropping it.

"Homework," I responded dumbly, reaching for my book. Surprisingly, she kicked it out of my reach. "What else would I be doing?"

"Oh, I don't know. Getting ready for the biggest dance of the year?" She cried, putting her hands on her tiny hips.

I snorted, "As if. No one asked me."

"So?"

"I don't have anything to wear," I said truthfully, looking away from her. "Besides. No amount of makeup can hide these hideous bruises," I muttered bitterly.

"Never say you don't have anything to wear," Yori smiled an evil smile that told me right away she was hiding something. I'd never thought she could pull off the evil smile- but somehow, she did. She turned away from me and pulled something out from a box under her bed.

Yuuki broke into a wide smile and pulled me up by the upper arms, forcing me into a standing position. "We made you a dress!" She cried happily.

My mouth dropped open. "You…did…what?" I screamed.

"We've been working on it for the past week," Yori admitted, unfolding a lump of sparkly dark blue and black cloth. "We decided all you needed was a little understanding and kindness. And you needed to be more social. So we thought that maybe…"

I stared at the dress. It was impressive. I'd expected Yuuki to fail at it for certain, but maybe Yori had kept her in line. It was black netted material, with an uneven hem that fell in jagged triangles. The glitter was subtle, but complimented the dress nicely. Underneath the black was a layer of dark blue that just showed through the dress. I swallowed, unsure of what to say. I didn't want it. I didn't want to wear the dumb thing, or even get into a dress if my life depended on it. But what would new Midori do? It was hard to tell with old Midori fighting tooth and nail about not getting into the dress. I decided that new Midori would put on the dress and go to the dance, just so all of their hard work didn't go to total waste. It wasn't like anyone had to see me in it, right? There was always the possibility that I could hide in the bathroom for the majority of the event.

"All right, fine," I began, "You win. I'll try it."

Yuuki squealed and clapped her hands together before attending to her hair. I stepped into the closet, even though it was small and cramped, and changed into the dress. It was itchy. It was itchy and it felt so wrong that I wanted to rip it off and burn it and never see it ever again and scatter its ashes around the country. But I had to try to be courteous, no matter how hard it was for me. As soon as I stepped out of the closet, the two pairs of eyes landed on me.

"Oh. My. Gosh!" Yuuki cried, jumping up, "It's perfect."

I hesitantly looked in the mirror, seeing someone I didn't recognize. What in the name of God was I turning into? Immediately Yori and Yuuki seized me, playing with my hair and makeup. There was so much makeup in the air that I coughed and sneezed and tried to fight them off, but it didn't work.

"This is wrong!" I cried, "I hate this! I'm going to murder you!" I screamed. But when they thrust me in front of the mirror, all made up like a doll, I had to admit they'd done a pretty good job. Sure, I hated feeling like a doll, but I decided that it definitely could have been worse. They hadn't stripped me of all my tom-boyish pride. "Let me rephrase. I'm going to murder you…after tonight."

As for shoes, I slipped on a pair of black hi-tops. They might have forced me to look like a girl, but I was determined to maintain my unique Midori-hood. Even if Yuuki and Yori shot me disapproving looks.

Whispers. Everyone recognized me, only for my bruises. Everyone was shocked. I tried not to throw up as I realized that boys were staring at me. It was the greatest and worst feeling in the world at the same time. Glares. I was actually getting glares from some of the girls. One girl in particular, though, was Tawny. In her gorgeous ice blue Cinderella ball gown, I couldn't imagine why. She was still the prettiest girl in the room. So I attracted attention for two seconds. Was that a reason for her to give me death stares? I returned her glare, and she immediately looked away. No one could out glare me.

The first person I noticed, though, was Zero. He wasn't dressed up, and he didn't look any different than before, but he still dominated my complete attention. I quickly looked away when I realized I'd been staring at him. What was happening to me? I wasn't sure how much more of this nice Midori stuff I could take. It was kind of starting to sicken me. I quickly hurried across the dance floor, and huddled into a corner, losing track of Yuuki and Yori. As far as I was concerned, Yuuki's little boyfriend Kaname could be sucking her blood right now. I'd just about had enough of her and her stupid shenanigans.

Zero walked over to me. He smirked, "Hi-tops, hm?"

"So?" I asked, defensively.

"Nothing. I just thought it was odd. Let me guess. Yuuki held you down and forced you into these crazy clothes."

"So I look bad?" I had a sudden moment of vanity where I panicked.

"I never said that. It's just so unlike you…are you feeling alright?"

I gently slapped him, "I'm feeling fine. But the more I talk to you, the sicker I feel."

"Okay, then I'll go away," he turned around.

"Wait!" I cried, repeating the incident from earlier, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

"I really don't understand you, you know that? I try and try and try to figure you out, but I just don't get it." Zero turned back around, standing up against the wall beside me. "I can't figure out if you have multiple personality disorder, or if you're trying to be nice, or what. So please, enlighten me, would you?"

"I wish I knew myself," I muttered, looking away from him.

Suddenly, Yuuki and Yori snuck up behind us and pushed us together. I squeaked and quickly backed away. "What was that for?" I said, turning bright red.

"If you two dance, we'll leave you alone," Yuuki smiled innocently. "Please? Just one little dance?"

"I can't dance," both Zero and I said at the same time.

"Then this should be extra interesting," Yuuki sang, pushing us together again and moving us into a proper dance stance.

The dance was awkward at first, especially with Yuuki and Yori breathing down our necks. But they backed off when we started getting the hang of it, and instead of stopping once they left us alone, for whatever reason, we continued. And slowly, we grew more comfortable. I noticed Tawny glaring again, and I knew that she couldn't stand the thought of me being with a guy when I had caused her to lose hers. Not that she was without guys, of course. They were left and right of her, begging for a dance. It wasn't my fault she was too proud to accept their invitations.

I suddenly suffered a moment of embarrassment, and I pulled away, and ran to the bathroom, where I threw up. And then I was too scared to go back out there, because I found I was even more embarrassed than before.

When I finally managed to return to the main room, I saw Zero right away. But he wasn't looking for me. He was being kissed by Tawny. And all I could do was sit back, watch, and wonder why I was even jealous.


	15. The Girl Who Cried Vandal

Now, I know I was a slightly-changed Midori, but that changed part was unstable, like an overfilled balloon. If you weren't careful, I could easily pop. My eyes clouded over, but I willed myself to hold everything in, and wound up sneezing instead. I could feel my imaginary balloon ready to rupture, as Tawny squeezed it to its last nerve with everything see had. Maybe I was wrong, but Zero did not seem like the type of guy Tawny would be interested. Zero didn't seem to be the type of guy to go around kissing mostly-strangers, either. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Tawny's skeleton little fingers were laced through his hair, holding his head to hers. I couldn't see exactly how Zero was reacting to it, because his back was to me.

The imaginary balloon popped. Old Midori came back with a fighting hope. So, I did what old Midori would have done, give or take the fact that old Midori had never fallen for a boy. Yes, I was willing to admit that I did have a crush on Zero. I'd been trying to pull away from the useless emotion, as it often became a painful distraction. A distraction that now put me in the middle of this mess. Except, if I was going to have this crush, and some slut who just decided she could have anyone she wanted (even though she was still technically Jet's girlfriend as far as I was aware), someone was going to BE crushed. I was immediately thankful for wearing sneakers, despite the model-like height Tawny had on me, especially with the heels. I strode over to the pair, eyes moist yet full of fire, and yanked Tawny away from him by the hair, spun her around and made sure I punched her in the face. Hard. I was fair and civil, and even though I wanted to push her to the floor and pound her to dust, I satisfied myself with that one punch.

Her hands flew to her face, and after a few seconds to take in what happened, she started wailing. Baby. I hadn't even given her a bloody nose. I was still seething with anger, though. That punch hadn't been enough. I felt a pair of hands begin to pull me gently away, through all of the dancers who were spinning around the floor like nothing had happened. I was almost disappointed no one had seen Tawny get hit. It would have been interesting for me to see their reactions to seeing the person they admired most punched in the face. I couldn't help but follow the person in a state of peace. Tawny deserved that punch more than anyone I'd ever fought in my life.

Except there was one problem. Now instead of the girl who didn't fight back, I'd be known as the girl who didn't fight back when attacked, but instead went around punching innocent girls in the face. There were some major PMS issues there. I didn't care what anyone else thought though, because Tawny was not the little innocent angel she made everyone believe she was. She was a spoiled slut. I hardly noticed the person pulling me away from the fight- well- the attack, was Yori. I could feel guilty about spoiling her dance later. Right now I was too busy trying to keep the rest of my emotions in order. After I lost it, they'd all been released from a tremendous amount of pressure. Now they were running all over the place, confusing my head and heart.

Yori sat me down on her bed, and began wiping the makeup off of my face, "What were you thinking?" She asked softly. She looked so sad that I didn't have the heart to snap at her.

I took the cloth she was using from her hand, and wiped the rest off myself. "I was thinking that Tawny is a dirty slut who can't deal with the fact that I was kind of enjoying myself for one night of my life."

Yori stood up from her kneeling position and started getting changed. "That wasn't an excuse for punching her, Midori-chan," Yori said, as if all of the hope she'd had for me had deflated out of her, "I thought you were getting better."

" 'getting better?' I wasn't broken!" It wasn't fair to be arguing with her, but she'd been the one playing with fire. And when you play with fire, you get burned.

"Midori," she said so softly that I had to strain my ears to hear, "You were sick. You tried to kill yourself- Yuuki told me. She's worried about you. Don't pretend like nobody cares about you, because it isn't true. Maybe if you tried to open up sometimes, you'd see that. Yuuki cares. I care. I'd even say that Zero cares, at least a little. You have trouble controlling yourself, and you always snap right back into defense mode whenever you're feeling bad about something. When you were being good, you were nice to be around. I know you're upset, Midori…I know. But you and Zero only had one dance. If you two were actually together, maybe I could understand it. But you aren't, and you have no right to be jealous of Tawny if Zero decides that's what suits him. Even though I don't like Tawny either, she didn't deserve that. It doesn't matter what you or me or anyone else thinks."

That was quite the speech. Mostly full of crap, but enough to at least make me a bit less tense, and reflect a little bit. "Where's Yuuki?" I muttered. I was more than happy that she wasn't here to lecture me as well, but I had to know.

"Kaname," Yori said simply, in a normal voice now. I nodded.

Then I crawled into my makeshift bed, still in my dress, but I didn't really care. I pulled the blanket over my head, and pretended to sleep. I just wanted to be left alone. But I couldn't help smiling to myself as I fell asleep.

That was a pretty awesome punch.

I was sitting in class when the Chairman pulled me out of class. I'd been expecting it all morning though. Tawny was standing beside him, her nose black and blue and her arms across her chest. She had a very defined pout, and it only made me want to punch her again. I had known from the beginning that Tawny would rat me out as soon as she got the chance, but I had still had a fleeting hope she wouldn't.

I smiled uncomfortably, pretending not to know what I was being called out for. "Chairman," I said politely with a quick bow. "Tawny." I tried not to sound annoyed with her. "What's this about?"

The Chairman frowned, "I think we all know what this is about, Midori."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I lied with a straight face. Lying had always been one of my strongest talents.

Tawny's face turned into a look of twisted rage that ruined her perfect features. "Don't play stupid you little witch! Look at what you did to my face!" She screamed, at the top of her lungs and stamping her foot. The Chairman put a hand on her shoulder.

"Why don't you go back to class?" He said calmly, "I'll speak with Midori privately."

With a huff, Tawny left. The Chairman sighed, "Go get your books and come to my office. We need to have a talk."

I wordlessly did as he ask, and I walked behind him silently to his office.

"Go on, sit," he gestured to the chair across from his desk, and I obediently sat down. He sat behind his desk, leaned forward with his elbows on his desk, and laced his fingers together. "Now explain to me what happened."

"Nothing happened," I protested, although I knew it was useless.

"Midori, why did you punch Tawny?"

I blushed, trying to make up an excuse. I mean, I couldn't say it was because she stole my dance partner right out from under me. So, I improvised with the first thing that came to my head.

"Because Tawny was the one who wrecked my room." Well, I was pretty sure she did that, anyways.

"Are you absolutely sure of that?"

"Well…no, not absolutely. But-"

"You don't have proof. I'm sorry Midori, but I can't punish her without proof. And…well, she has some pretty convincing proof against you. Like a blueberry colored nose, for one."

"That's not proof! Anyone could have done that!" I whined.

"Midori. You aren't…the most…stable person…" The Chairman was trying to say that I wasn't trustworthy, and I had problems controlling my anger.

"Shut up!" I cried, "That isn't fair. You don't trust me just because I've been a problem before. But when I-"

"Have you ever heard of the Boy who Cried Wolf?"

I was silent.

"Tawny did it, I know she did."

"And maybe she did, Midori," the Chairman paused for a moment, "But even if she did, that doesn't excuse the fact that you punched her in the face. I'm afraid I still have to punish you…but I won't expel you. Tawny asked that I give you another chance."

I had a bad feeling in my gut. Why would Tawny want to keep me around if not to torture me even more than she already had? When I thought of what Tawny could do to make my life a nightmare, I was almost prepared to beg to be expelled. Almost. "So…what's my punishment?" I asked slowly.


	16. A Nudge in the Right Direction

Cleaning the horses' stables for a week and a half. That was what my punishment turned out to be. What the Chairman wasn't aware of, was that it was far from a punishment. I probably mentioned before that I love animals. Just being around them made me feel better. However, the work itself wasn't exactly fun, either. I sat down on a bale of hay, exhausted after I was barely halfway done. There was so much that I had to do! And not to mention all of the schoolwork I had on top of this. The sun was already setting, and I still needed to finish my punishment for the day, get back to my temporary dorm, wash up, do my homework, and finally help Yuuki and Zero patrol for the night. Just thinking about it made my head spin. I stood up, knowing that I better hurry up and finish my work before the real person who was supposed to be doing this showed up. The man who usually cleaned the stables promised the Chairman that he would check up on my work to make sure I was doing everything right.

If there was one thing I was avoiding, though, it was cleaning Lily's stall. The thought made me shudder. I knew that she was psycho, and I was not prepared to get attacked by a horse under any circumstances. But, I decided I might as well get it over with now. So I cautiously approached her stall, which caused her to stamp her feet and jerk backwards. Oh, boy.

"Shh…it's okay, Lily," I whispered, slowly extending my arms out towards her. She paused, as if curious about me. My hand made contact with her nose, and she didn't seem to mind. I exhaled, not even realizing that I'd been holding my breath. I suddenly smiled, relieved. Maybe she wasn't the vicious horse everyone had scared me into believing.

"How are you doing in here?" A sudden voice inquired. Lily suddenly whinnied, and backed away from me again, any trust I'd had with her gone.

It took me a second to catch my breath and get my heart started again. I couldn't say if I'd been more scared by the voice of the man behind me, or Lily's reaction. "Just fine." I shut my eyes. He carefully inspected the work I'd done so far.

He grunted a simple, "Good job," and left. My gaze returned to the frightened horse, who I desperately tried to soothe again.

I held out a hand towards her, and turned my head away, trying to get her to come to me. Surprisingly, a few seconds later, I felt a warm nose pressed against the palm of my hand again. I took a deep breath, and looked at her. I gently removed my hand, and opened her stall door. She moved backwards again, suspicious of me. I ignored her, and gave her food and water. This seemed to put her at ease, showing I wasn't scared of her, but wasn't smothering her either.

Suddenly, I noticed a foot sticking out from behind a bale of Lily's hay. I had to do a double-take to make sure I wasn't seeing things. I wasn't seeing things, and there really was a foot sticking out. As Lily went for her food, I walked behind her, to find Zero, asleep. Or, what I at least hoped was asleep. Hesitantly, I poked him with my foot, and put my shovel against the wall. "Zero?" I asked, bending down a little bit. His eyes fluttered open, and suddenly I remembered I was mad at him. No matter how amazing and peaceful he'd looked asleep. I backed away from him.

He sat up, and rubbed his eyes. "Midori?" He stood up, looking slightly embarrassed.

"What?" I glared, clutching my shovel.

"Are you…okay?" He asked uncomfortably, "About Tawny…"

"There's nothing to say about her!" I cried, gripping the shovel tighter, "Besides that she's prettier, more popular, and more likable than me. And she's obviously a better kisser, too." I slammed the shovel down to the ground.

"You don't really think I wanted to do that," Zero asked, surprised.

"Oh, no. You just always go around kissing girls you can't stand," I cried, taking a step closer to him and starting a stare off.

"Midori, you have this all wrong. Let me begin by saying that Tawny just walked up to me, and grabbed me by the hair and started kissing me. And let me finish by asking why you're jealous."

I opened my mouth, about to say something, but suddenly I didn't know what to say to that. Because he was right. Why was I jealous? I shut my mouth. "W-well…how do I know you're telling me the truth?" I asked, skeptically. "How do I know she kissed you?"

"Because don't you see what she's trying to do? She's angry with you for getting Jet expelled. See where this is going? She's trying to make you miserable." He hesitantly put a hand on my shoulder, and cracked a smirk. "Do you really think I'd kiss someone like Tawny?" He shuddered.

I gave a weak smile, when I realized that he made a good point. "I-I guess not…" I turned bright red and looked away. "And…I had no right…to be jealous in the first place," I concluded. I bent over and picked up the shovel. "Now…if you'll excuse me, I have a job to finish."

He put his hands around my hands that were around the shovel. "Midori…I am really sorry about not getting Jet away from you."

"Don't sweat it," I shrugged, avoiding looking into his eyes, "It wasn't your fight anyways." I could feel my hands sweating. "A-and I mean the bruises are getting better…"

"Why won't you look at me?" Zero inquired, making me blush even redder. What was happening to me?

"I'm embarrassed, I mean…just about how wrong I was about the whole Tawny thing…" I swallowed a lump in my throat.

"There's something else, isn't there?"

"Not at all. Please, I really need to finish this. I still need to do homework, and patrol, and…shower," I looked up at him for the first time. The lump I'd just swallowed returned with vengeance. That was all it took. One little look in his eyes and I found myself unable to look away. I could hardly believe how weak I was.

Suddenly, Lily rammed into my back. That was all it took for me to be slammed into Zero. Lily nudged my head, and suddenly Zero's lips brushed against mine. It lasted less than a heartbeat, though. Embarrassed and shocked, I backed away, unsure of his emotions towards it. "I'm so sorry!" I squeaked, gripping the shovel against my chest. I was too embarrassed to stay in the barn, though. I dropped the shovel and ran.


	17. Not Only Am I Invisible, I'm Mute, Too

I kept running, until I was eventually back in the safety of Yuuki and Yori's dorm. Neither one of them was in it, thankfully. I fell onto my makeshift bed, which was essentially the floor. What had I just done? It was the horse's fault, yes, but that was hardly a legitimate excuse when trying to explain why I did it. My face felt hot. No one was here to see me cry, but it didn't make the embarrassment any less brutal. More than anyone else, I had embarrassed myself the most. And that alone was enough to make me feel like the smallest speck of dust in the universe. I pulled my knees up against my chest, and tried to relax. It had been an accident, right? Zero would understand that accidents happened, especially around animals. Or, at least, I hoped he'd understand. I really hadn't meant to do it, even though I couldn't deny the part of me that had always wanted to. I never intended to actually do it, not in my wildest dreams. But it had been a kiss. A small one, yes. But it was like a small gift to me, a tiny want fulfilled even when everything else was going wrong. A consolation for everything that I suffered through. I let a wide grin spread across my face in spite of myself, until I was smiling and laughing like a Cheshire cat. It seemed ridiculous, really. The thought of me kissing someone. Yet it had happened. It had happened, and I was the luckiest girl in the world. Peck or not, a kiss was a kiss.

I couldn't believe how worked up I was getting about this. Though it was really hard not to get worked up about it. Because I had kissed the boy who I'd had a secret crush on for ages now. And then I'd bolted. My smile faded. I'd just run off, leaving him in the dark, probably wondering why I'd done it to begin with. Then let him wonder, I decided. Let him wonder why I kissed him. It would be easier that way. I didn't really have anything to explain for, did I?

Breathe, Midori. You need to breathe. It was too hard to get all of my thoughts in order when they were so scattered around in frustration. I was lucky enough to spend the rest of the day alone, trying to collect myself again.

The following day, I was sitting in science class, the only one without a lab partner. It didn't really bother me, except for the fact that I wasn't absolutely certain that I was doing everything right. We were supposed to be making a chemical reaction that caused the liquid in the beaker to change color. I silently groaned to myself as I looked for an ingredient that I wasn't finding. Where did it go? I'd had it only a few minutes ago. I slammed my hands down on the lab table, and then carefully rubbed my temples. Why was everything going wrong?

"Looking for this?" A voice teased, putting a test tube full of a powdery substance in front of me. I swiped it up, and then looked up, ready to thank the person. However as soon as I saw that it was Tawny, I frowned, and looked back to my work. I uncapped the test tube, and poured it in, little by little, until there was enough. Suddenly, the beaker began to bubble over, spilling onto the table and then the floor. I quickly stood up and stepped back, removing my safety glasses to make sure I was really seeing this.

I looked at Tawny, with a look of confusion. She smirked, shrugged, and returned to her lab table, before turning back to me and waving a test tube in the air. The real one, of course. She'd switched them out! The mixture was simmering down now, and all eyes were on me. The teacher stormed over to me, and snatched the test tube of powder from my hand.

"What is this?" He demanded, his face turning beet red.

I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, and backed away from him with my head lowered. "I-I don't know," I stammered. "I lost the real ingredient…and then T-"

"Go find a janitor, and get this mess cleaned up."

"What? No! It wasn't my-"

"I'm going to ask you one more time to clean it up," he warned.

"No, wait, please listen-"

"I don't even want to hear excuses, Midori! Chairman's office, now!" He barked.

My fire was gone. Tawny had won, yet again. I slowly placed my safety glasses on the edge of the table, and then walked out of the room, like a wounded animal. My pride was hurting, and now people would be talking about me, yet again. Before I knew it, the story would turn into 'Midori blew up the chemistry lab!'

As I entered the Chairman's office, I was shocked to find Zero sitting there as well. I felt my face flush again, and I wanted to turn tail and run, this time as far away from this stupid school as possible.

"What are you doing here?" I asked weakly, sitting down in the chair beside him.

"Filing a harassment form against Tawny," he grumbled, "She keeps trying to…never mind. What did you do now?" He shook his head, putting the paper he'd been filling out on the Chairman's desk.

"Tawny switched my ingredients in Chemistry," I mumbled, "My mixture turned into a volcano. I tried to tell the teacher…but…he wouldn't even hear it. When I refused to clean it up…"

"Do you think she'll ever stop?"

I shrugged, "Well, maybe. I mean she has to get bored eventually…" I wasn't so sure, though.

I couldn't believe how normal he was being. Maybe he'd forgotten all about it…but I couldn't even lie to myself about that. It apparently just hadn't been a big deal to him.

The Chairman walked in, and his expression fell to disappointment. "Midori…I wish I could say it was a pleasure…but…" He appeared to be inspecting me for cuts, bruises, or bleeding. "Zero…you can finish your form another time. Could you please go back to your class?"

"Hn. Of course," he said quietly, before leaving.

"Midori, really? Can you not stay out of trouble for one day?" The Chairman asked.

"It wasn't my fault this time!" I protested, knowing it was useless. "Tawny switched my ingredients in chemistry, and then when I tried to explain it to-"

"What is this problem you have going on with Tawny? She's really a sweet girl, from what I've experienced. I think you and Zero are taking this a little bit too far."

"Wait. I couldn't find the ingredient I needed, and then there she was, standing over me, holding out a test tube. I took it, but when I used it…it completely ruined my experiment! She knew!" I cried, standing up, making wild hand gestures.

"Maybe she just picked up a misplaced ingredient, and assumed it was yours. I doubt she knew what it would do. I'm sure she's sorry for it now."

"But after it happened, she waved the real test tube at me! She's trying to ruin my life, because I got her boyfriend expelled!"

"This is no way to talk about someone who saved you from being expelled, Midori. Am I really supposed to believe the only reason she wanted you to stay was so she could get some silly payback?"

When he said it, it sounded much less realistic. "Then please, expel me already so I can get away from her!"

"Now why would I do that? Obviously you and Tawny just have some differences that you need to settle. To help bond you two, I'm ordering that you both have counseling sessions together every other day for a week. If you're still having problems then, come back and we'll talk. I really just think that this is all one big misunderstanding, though. One more major slip up out of you, though, and I will seriously consider expelling you."

I moaned, "But how am I supposed to go to counseling if I already have to clean the stables, and do homework?"

"I'm sure you'll find a way to fit it in," he said, waving me off, "Now you may go back to class."

"Why would you think that I would purposely switch your ingredients?" Tawny asked innocently, batting her eyelashes at me.

"Because you did! I saw you holding my real test tube you lying little manipulative bi-"

"Midori!" The counselor warned, holding up a hand. "This is about forgiveness and understanding. Not arguing over who did or didn't do something."

"Are you kidding? After I saw your experiment fall apart, I felt terrible for you. But you can't keep blaming me for your mistakes. I mean, like, it isn't my fault," Tawny said as sincerely as she could. The counselor was just eating up her sugar and honey. But it made me want to gag.

"Midori, I know you're going through a hard time right now. And sometimes accepting our own mistakes is difficult, so we turn the blame on other people. Tawny was just trying to help you, hun. Does this have something to do with jealousy, maybe?"

I sighed in frustration, knowing that obviously no one was hearing me.


	18. Tomboy

Zero grimaced. "Counseling, huh? With Tawny?"

I nodded, feeding Lily and giving her fresh water. "Nobody believes me! They all think she's a little angel." I rolled my eyes, and stroked Lily's long nose. "Can you hand me that brush over there?"

Zero chucked the brush at my head, I ducked in time, though, and the brush landed in Lily's water pail with a splash. "Watch it," I growled, picking the brush up out of the water. I dried it off as best I could with my working shirt. Then I carefully began brushing Lily's mane, and she was surprisingly enjoying it.

"You know, I don't think Lily has ever tolerated anyone besides me," Zero commented, coming up on the other side of her and petting her.

I smiled a little. "I guess I have a thing with animals. They're more understanding than people," I said, my smile fading. "They never judge you, or call you names, or start fights…they're like the perfect companion. Everyone always calls Lily the demon horse, but I don't believe that at all. They just don't…try to respect her, an she doesn't like that."

"So, like you, then?" Zero asked casually, not looking at me.

"W-what? Why would you say that?" My eyes narrowed, and I couldn't tell if he was insulting me or complimenting me.

"No one understands you, so you pretend to be some complete jerk. Everyone's afraid of you. The same is true for Lily."

"For someone who ditches class all of the time, that's pretty insightful. But how do you know I'm not a complete jerk all of the time?" I started brushing out Lily's tail, which she was enjoying much less than her mane.

"Because I've seen you when you aren't under everyone else's pressure. And you aren't as scary as everyone thinks."

"Well, neither are you, you know," I said, putting the brush down, and walking around Lily to face him. "The only reason I 'pretend' to be that way is because I know what it's like to have people you love ripped away from you. Sometimes it's easier to never love at all. Then you have nothing to lose, you know?" I turned away from him, suddenly uncomfortable. Now that I thought about it, I was getting a little too close to him.

There was complete silence for a while. "Midori, can I ask you a question?" Zero asked, sighing.

"I-I guess. Sure. Shoot," I stammered, unsure of whether or not I liked what was coming.

"The other day…The horse just bumped into you, right?" He asked, slowly. It wasn't in a demanding tone, but in a more curious, playful tone that I'd never heard him use before.

I immediately blushed bright red, yet again. "What? Oh. That. Yeah, of course. I mean why would I actually…" I turned around to face him again, suddenly too wrapped up in embarrassment to continue speaking.

"Kiss me?" He finished quietly, taking a step closer to me.

"I didn't mean to…I didn't know what you'd think, so I fled," I mumbled, looking down at the ground. He was studying me, trying to figure me out.

"Yeah. Of course." Suddenly all of the tension that had been building up collapsed, as he sighed and took a step back. "I was just…curious. You never seemed like the type to…"

"Kiss you?" I squeaked quietly, as he turned away from me.

"You wouldn't, of course, not on purpose. You're too much of a tomboy, hn?" His voice was almost…upset? Angry? I couldn't tell what emotion he was experiencing.

I smiled weakly, secretly dying because of his comment. He thought I was a…tomboy? I might have been distant, cold, hard-hearted, and a million other things, but I was by no means a tomboy. I quite enjoyed being a girl, thank you very much. My heart sank to the floor as he said that. He thought I was a tomboy. And he obviously had no feelings for me past friendship, if he even felt that.

"Yeah, of course…that's me," my voice fell to a whisper. "The tomboy."

Zero turned back towards me, a look of confusion spreading across his face. "What's the matter?"

I tried to smile, but it was growing harder the more he talked. "Nothing. I just…I don't know…" I backed against the wall, then turned around, pretending to look for something. "You should go start patrol," I murmured. Why was this bothering me so much?

"Relax. Yuuki can handle it," Zero said quietly, "What's the matter?"

"Nothing!" I cried, although I knew my voice gave away that that wasn't the case. "Please just go away. I need to be alone right now."

And just like that, he was gone. I turned to Lily. "A tomboy, huh? Really?"

Lily just looked away from me and started eating.

"I'm not a tomboy," I whispered, sitting on the ground. "I'll show him…"


	19. The Things You Weren't Meant to Hear

Okay, before I start this chapter, I just have a few quick little things to say.

1. I never, ever thought that this story would get this popular. In my opinion, it's my worst story.

2. Thank you all SOOOO much for all of the feedback and reviews! Nothing makes my day more than opening my email and getting review alerts. (Surprisingly, I read 'em, too) I love hearing what you have to say! 3 I know it's cliché, but I seriously love getting them more than anything else in the world.

3. As for the tomboy comment, Midori took it the wrong way. There's nothing wrong with tomboys- she just doesn't want to be thought of as "boyish" by her crush.

4. I make a solemn vow, right now, to make sure Midori never, ever becomes a Mary-Sue character.

/Onward!\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

"Midori, are you in here?" A soft voice asked from just outside of the barn the next day. It was a female's voice. It was nasally and unnaturally high-pitched. I jammed the edge of my shovel into the dirt floor.

"Nope," I said, sarcastically, pulling my hair back into a ponytail and wiping the sweat off of the back of my neck. It was stifling hot in the barn, like being in the middle of a furnace that was slowly overheating. The horses weren't holding out much better than I was, either. When Tawny strolled in, I wished that my imaginary furnace would just explode already, blowing her into oblivion. But, if everything happened that I wanted, than the world would be a very dark, very lonely place, with everyone I couldn't stand, which was pretty much people in general, gone. "What do you want?" I groaned, putting my hands on my hips.

She wrinkled her nose at the smell, but I thought I saw a flash of approval in her eyes. "So this is your punishment, huh?" She smiled a little, thrilled that I was having to go through this 'torture.' I wanted to tell her that it was only a punishment when she had walked in.

"Yeah," I glared at her, stroking Lily's nose gently. Lily had grown unsettled, as if prepared to attack Tawny and stamp her to death. It was a tempting thought, but I restrained myself. "But I only have a week or two left." A week or two, and then I'd no longer get to care for Lily and the other horses anymore. Then how would I spend my afternoons? I'll admit, it wasn't the most glorious job, but it allowed me to spend some time by myself, with no one but the horses. And I appreciated the alone time. The alone time that Tawny was currently ruining.

Suddenly, she collapsed onto a bale of hay, and began to cry into her hands. I blinked, unsure of how to react. I desperately wanted to hit her again, because her whiney-sounding cry was enough to make you want to shoot yourself in the ears, but the other part of me wanted to know why she was crying. It was pretty hard not to be curious, after all. This was Tawny, after all, and the Tawny I'd come to know didn't cry.

"What's…wrong?" I asked carefully. Was this a joke, or was she seriously breaking down in front of me?

"Oh, Midori, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to treat you like crap, I was just blaming you for Jet being expelled. I loved him, you know? If you ripped apart our love, I thought you shouldn't be able to have love or nice things either. So I ruined your room and I kissed Zero, ick, by the way, and I did switch the ingredients. But then Jet broke up with me…and I realized that he wasn't worth it in the end. But I loved him so much!" She was sobbing hysterically, and I let my shovel drop to the ground.

Dirty. Little. Liar.

There was no way, no way on this blue planet, that Tawny was sorry. She was a terrible actress, and the fakest person I had ever meant. At first, listening to her cry, I had felt a stab of pity. And then I'd felt confused. Confusion was followed by a dab of anger. And now I was just annoyed. Was she really that determined to ruin my life, that she'd attempt to make me think that she was sorry? Did she really think I would fall for it, just so she could turn around later and ruin my life again? I couldn't just tell her to go jump off of a cliff, though.

But, could I possibly give her the benefit of the doubt, and accept her apology and hope she meant it? No, I couldn't do that either. She was too much of a sneaky little weasel for that. After all of the Hell that she'd put me through, doing that now would be a stupid move on my part.

I swallowed. "Tawny, if you really meant that, you would tell the Chairman that it wasn't my fault my chemistry experiment went wrong."

"I can't!" A flash of anger shot through her eyes, but she quickly covered it up with a look that would have made Hitler feel bad for her. But I wasn't buying it. "If I get in trouble this school year, my dad will…he'll…" Tawny pretended to flinch. "He'll…hurt me," her voice was barely a whisper. If I wasn't so cautious and unwilling to let emotions play with me, I might have believed her. She was a good actress, actually. I was just better at seeing through it.

She wasn't the only one who could act, though.

"I'm…sorry Tawny. I had no idea," I said, my voice suddenly gentle and understanding. She looked shocked for a moment, but then broke into a smile. "I'm sorry I turned your face black and blue."

She appeared to be relieved. "Thank you, Midori! I promise, I won't give you any trouble!"

As she turned around and walked out, I silently pantomimed gagging. As if I would trust her. The lying, deceitful little freak. I didn't know what she was up to, but I wasn't buying it.

**Later** that night, we were both sitting in the Counselor's office, where we were performing "trust exercises." Tawny had tried to explain that everything was 'all right between us now,' but the counselor decided that we'd better keep coming, just to make sure. That had pissed Tawny off, I could tell right away.

"All right girls," the counselor began, "For this first exercise, I'm going to state a hypothetical situation, and you're going to tell me what you would do. So, first one. Let's say Midori was sitting outside eating lunch, and a group of kids walked over to her and began harassing her. Tawny, what would you do?"

Tawny smiled, and answered in a sickly-sweet voice, "Well, of course I'd go over and tell them politely to leave her alone."

Full. Of. Crap. That's what she was. I gave a fake smile to Tawny, as if I really appreciated her thought. The only one who had to buy it was the counselor.

"Good, good," the counselor said, a smile playing across her face. Well, weren't we all just smiley, smiley today? "Now, moving on. Let's say that there was a rumor going around that Tawny said that you were fat. What would you do, Midori?"

Punch her in the face, because I would know it wasn't a rumor. But, the sooner I could make the counselor think we were okay, the sooner I could get out of these dumb counseling sessions. So I smiled, flattened my skirt on my legs, scooted up to the edge of the chair, and began my sickening speech. "Well, I would ask Tawny about it, and if she said that she didn't, I would believe it, and forget about it."

I would have to wash my mouth out with soap later, I decided.

**After **the counseling session, I went back to the stables, and went into Lily's stall. I was supposed to be patrolling, but I figured that no one would care. She immediately clung to me, searching for a sign that I had a treat for her. When she realized that I didn't have anything for her, she backed off and drank some water. "Sorry girl," I whispered, "I didn't mean to disappoint you."

I sat down in the corner of her stall, and began talking. "Why does he think I'm a tomboy? Just because I'm a little rough doesn't mean that I'm a tomboy…I'm just…misunderstood. But…I'm not a tomboy. I don't mind wearing skirts and dresses all that much, I just think they're uncomfortable. But…I can be a girl, too." Lily was ignoring me, but I pretended that she was listening. After all, it wasn't like I could talk to any human girls about this. "I wish I could prove to him that I'm not really what I seem to be…but…he just makes me feel so uncomfortable. I'm not used to it…I've always been so independent. This feeling is still so new…but how could he even ever be more than a friend if he thought of me as a boy every time he saw me?"

Silence.

"Who am I kidding? You're a horse. You can't understand me. I just…wish I could talk to someone…" I looked at Lily, and then at one of the windows. "Someone who could understand me."

"Midori…? Uh…"

"Oh great…now I'm hearing things. For a second there I thought you were talking to-"

"Not the horse. Over here," the voice said. I looked up to see Zero standing at the stall door, looking down at me.

The color suddenly drained from my face. "Z-zero! What are you- what are you- how much of that did you hear?" I stood up, backing against the wall.

"Enough…"


	20. Same Old, Same Old

Warning: The chapter gets really fluffy at the end, and a bit OOC as well. Sorry, but I was dying to write this chapter, and I needed the fluff in this overall depressing story.

/Onward\\\\\\\\\

"Enough?" I asked, feeling my lunch threaten to come up. What the hell was enough supposed to mean, exactly?

He nodded, slowly. "Were you talking to the horse, just now?" He asked, curiously.

"Y-yeah. I was, actually. I just needed to vent, preferably to someone who didn't give sarcastic remarks as responses." I rationalized that telling the truth would be a better plan than lying. Why build a complicated web that I may not be able to get out of later on?

He didn't respond to that, and went quiet for a moment. "Who were you talking about?" He asked quietly, leaning against the doorframe of Lily's stall.

On second thought, lying was a good plan. "No one," I said instantly, without a moment of hesitation. "Just…a friend."

I was waiting for the 'You have friends?' joke to come, but it never did, so I relaxed a little bit. Zero seemed to be deep in thought.

"So, why were you looking for me?" I changed the subject, slowly walking towards him.

"Well, Yuuki and I hadn't seen you for the past few hours, so Yuuki told me that we should search for you, and make sure you were still in one piece."

My heart sank. Of course it would be because Yuuki told him to. "Oh. Well…here I am. So you can…go now," I sighed. If I had been brave, I would have said something else to him. Tried to prolong the conversation- anything. But instead I just shooed him away.

His eyebrows knit together in a look of confusion that I rarely saw on him. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing at all. I'm the infallible tomboy, remember? Things don't bother me. Nothing is ever wrong, Zero. Why would something be wrong with me? Just because I'm quiet, hate the presence of other people, and, oh, did I mention I can't stand to be treated like a piece of trash? No, nothing is wrong at all. Everything is just plain out wonderful. My life is just complicated, but everything is just fine, okay? So get the hell out of my business!" Wow. What had just come out of my mouth? I put a hand to my mouth, in shock.

"Alright, fine. I'll leave you alone, if that's what you want. I didn't realize you were so upset." He held up his hands in an act of surrender, and began to walk out.

"Wait! I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. I just…I'm confused, Zero, that's all." It was if someone had taken my remote control and was playing with the volume buttons. First loud, now barely a whisper.

He turned around, "Aren't we all?" He sounded a little bit irritated, now. "You always sulk around, with a dark little cloud strung above your head, and you expect everyone to feel bad for you. You strive to get attention from people who don't actually care about you. But when the people who do actually care about you try and help you, you always push them away and pretend like you can handle yourself. And you know what? I don't get it. You and I both know that you're falling to pieces. And you think that nobody cares about you. Well you know what? You have what you wanted. Yuuki cares about you. Yori cares about you, even though she might not be as willing to show it. She's scared of you, because you're so damn hard to please. You crave attention, but when you get it, you push it away. You push it away and go right back into your stupid little titanium shell, where you hide out and pretend to be tough. You're like a clam. Hard to open and rough on the outside, but inside, somewhere, there's soft pink."

His voice got quiet again, "And I know that somewhere, inside, there's a pearl, too. All you need to do is open up and show everyone. We can't all wait for you to clean up this oil spill of a depression. You need to want to fix yourself, and stop expecting everyone else to."

I grew silent, and looked at the ground. Right now, I felt very much like a speck of dust, wanting to blow away and die. Because I knew he was right.

"I'm not asking you to change," his voice was gentler now. He opened the door to the stable, and put a hand on my shoulder, so that we were hardly four inches away from each other. "I like you the way you are. But I don't like seeing you constantly hurting yourself. Because you aren't the only one that you're hurting. I know Yuuki's annoying to you, but she does care, and she's hurting. And Yori does a little bit, too, and likewise, she's hurting. But honestly?" He shut his eyes, took a deep breath, and then opened his eyes again. "You're hurting me too."

I looked at his hand on my shoulder, and swallowed. "I-I didn't mean to…ever…"

"Shh. I know. I know a lot more than you give me credit for." Before I even knew what was happening, he was leaning towards me, and holding my chin up so I could look into his eyes. And then it happened. Yeah, I know you already know what happened. He kissed me, in an almost cute, awkward way. Most girls, like Tawny, would have found him to be a horrible kisser, and would have slapped him and run away. But the awkwardness in it almost made it sweet, in a strange, unexplainable sort of way. It wasn't awkward in that there were any mixed feelings between us, no, believe me, I could sense the immense feeling of pleasure that was exchanged between us. It was just that it was so easy to tell he didn't know what he was doing, and that he wasn't very experienced at it. Which I was perfectly okay with.

The kiss didn't last long, and he pulled away after what seemed like too short of a time. "Like I know that you've been waiting for that for a long time now." He looked embarrassed. Almost…afraid that I'd hit him or something? I smiled at the thought, knowing that that couldn't be the case.

"How long have you known?"

"Long enough," he smirked, and I batted him, harder than I meant to, but not so hard he'd think that I meant to, on the side of the head. He gave a little smile. "Same old Midori."

"No," I said, "That's not right. I'm same old happier Midori."

We exchanged smiles after that, barely seen in the now almost pitch black barn, the result of the moon going behind the clouds.

"Good. I wouldn't have it any other way."


	21. A Bitter Letter

"Midori…why do you look so dazed?" Yori asked as I walked into the dorm. My room was almost entirely fixed- they only had to paint over the graffiti and wait for the new windows to come in. I relished the moment, knowing to myself it would be one of my last nights with roommates, and one of my last nights sleeping on the floor. I felt myself turning red with embarrassment yet again. She was sitting up in her bed now, rubbing at her eyes. I took a quick glance at the clock. Ten.

"I…uh…tired" I stuttered awkwardly, but then chose to change the subject. "Did I wake you?"

Yori shook her head no, but I knew that she was just being polite. "Goodnight, Midori," she murmured, and disappeared beneath her blanket. Yuuki was in her bed as well, but she was sleeping like a rock. And snoring, too. Her snoring was something I definitely wouldn't miss. I smiled to myself. I was safe from their questions, for now. Had Yuuki been awake, I would have had some trouble, because when I was happy, I apparently wasn't very good at masking it. When I was sure Yori was asleep, I quietly changed into my pajamas, and the crawled into my makeshift bed. "Just a few more nights, Midori. Hang in there," I muttered softly to myself. And for that night, I was nearly entirely okay with sleeping on the floor.

The loud, horrible, beeping noise of a truck backing up woke me up with a start the next morning. It had woken Yori up, too. Not surprisingly, Yuuki was unaffected. I could hear the sound of the truck's engine, still running wildly. "How dare they wake us up on a day off," I whined, sitting up.

Yori didn't respond, but climbed out of her bed and over to the window. Then she turned to me. "I would think you'd be happy, Midori. It's your windows being delivered."

I blinked, surprised. The windows hadn't been supposed to come for another two days. Yet I was happy, finally feeling like things would be going right again. I stood up, and ran over to the window, pressing my nose up against the glass surface. Sure enough, two men were carrying out two cardboard boxes, each the size of a window. I smiled, and shut my eyes. Maybe tonight I could go back into my room. Or at most tomorrow. The thought put a little bit of optimism inside of me, and I wanted to go and install the new windows right then, all by myself. I would have loved to. But I held back, knowing that was obviously out of the question. I returned to my little sleeping area, and looked at Yori with a completely blank look. "I'm going to follow Yuuki's example, and go back to sleep. Wake me, and I'll make you wish you were never born." I gave her my best death-glare, and took pleasure in giving it. Today was a good day, and today I would sleep in. No matter what.

Yori nodded, a sprinkle of fear in her eyes. I turned on my side, facing the wall. I couldn't seem to stop smiling at myself, no matter how hard I tried. I managed to drift back to sleep, the smile still stuck onto my face with superglue.

Someone was shaking me, and whispering into my ear, "Midori, wake up!" I lashed out a hand and smacked the person in the face.

"Ow!" Yuuki squeaked, releasing my shoulder. "Yori warned me not to wake you up, but um…Zero's looking for you. So I thought you might want to know."

I shot up immediately at the mention of his name, but then realized that that was a mistake. Luckily, Yuuki didn't find it odd that my excitement grew at the mention of his name. Luckily she couldn't hear the pounding of my heart in my chest, or the way my brain was replaying last night's occurrences. Yuuki didn't know any of my feelings, and I wanted to keep it that way. "He is?" I asked, trying not to sound too hopeful, "Why?" I was silently pleading that my voice didn't give anything away.

Yuuki shrugged, a bored, blank look on her face. "Who knows? He's so weird, you know…but you'd better go and find him, or else he might think I didn't tell you."

"Alright, alright…" I tossed my blanket off of me, and began digging through my suitcase of clothing. I pulled out a pair of nice, clean clothes. Black jeans and a simple white tank top with a long-sleeved black sweater over it. Plain, but I had never been one for fancy clothing. Why waste my time with such frivolous things, anyways? I never quite understood it. I rushed out of the dorm, tying my hair into a ponytail on the way.

I found Zero at our meeting place- the barn. Somehow, we had a mutual understanding that if we were looking for one another, that was where to go. I wasn't sure when the agreement had been established, but now it was just understood.

"You were looking for me?" I asked, no emotion accenting my voice.

He nodded. "The Chairman wanted me to run some errands for him. I figured I'd take you along, if you'd like. You need some fresh air."

On the outside, I shrugged, and kept a straight face. "Cool. Sure, I'll go." The last thing I wanted to do was go out in public, but hey, whatever. If I was with Zero, maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Ah, don't you just love my deductive reasoning skills? Yeah, I thought so.

"Well, we should get going," he said lazily, gesturing towards the door. I took the lead, secretly wondering why Yuuki wasn't the one doing this job. I would have assumed that Zero offered to do the errands, to get some alone time with me, but I wasn't going to flatter myself. Zero trailed behind me, and the girlish part of me hoped this might turn out to be almost like his way of asking me on a date. But again, I wasn't going to flatter myself, because in the end, I knew it wasn't going to last. Relationships rarely do, these days. I'd been hurt before. Ever since, I'd built a wall around my heart, and I was bound and determined to keep everyone out.

So why, oh why, had people been taking a battering ram to it lately?

"So what's our first task?" I asked, my hands in my pockets, as we walked down the sidewalk, through mobs of happy people.

"He gave me some letters to take to the post office. So I figure we might as well get that done first, just to get rid of them. After all, I'm likely to lose them." He produced a small stack of letters from his coat pocket, and handed them to me.

I leafed through them, looking at who they were addressed to. Okay, so I was a little nosy, but I was curious to whom a guy like the Chairman could send letters to. One of the addresses in particular caught my attention. And as soon as I saw it, I was insulted, upset, and extremely angry.

Yoshio's Psychiatric Hospital.

I stopped dead in my tracks, because I knew immediately what this letter was about, without even ripping it open. Zero didn't notice I'd stopped for a few steps, but then he stopped, and turned around. I felt an odd sensation of sadness and anger boiling up inside of me.

"Midori?" Zero asked, a look of concern on his face.

"I'm not crazy," I choked out, trying not to cry. I dropped all of the letters onto the sidewalk, except for the one for the hospital. I clutched that one to my chest. Zero held out a hand, and I briefly wondered if he'd known about this. I doubted it, but I also knew that I didn't want him to know about it.

I bolted, pushing my way through groups of people. There was no way, no way I was going back to that stupid Academy. I wasn't crazy. And I wasn't about to let people think that I was either. The Chairman might be my guardian, but he was not going to send me away. Zero was running after me, I could hear him shouting my name. But I lost him, and ran into an alley, where I hid myself behind a trashcan, full of what looked like leftover noodles and takeout containers.

With trembling hands, I opened up the letter. Yeah, it's illegal- but I really couldn't care less about what was legal and what wasn't at the moment. I unfolded the piece of paper, which had very neat, very clear print. I read the letter out loud to myself softly.

"_Dear Dr. Hakudo,_

_I am writing to you on behalf of one of the adolescents that is currently under my care. From day one, she has been odd, and mentally unstable as well. She had random, unexplainable bouts of anger, followed by depression. She isolates herself, and has tried to commit suicide on a previous occasion. From what I have seen, she has been in several fights, punched another student at my school, and I fear she is a danger to herself and others. I think it would be in best interests if she was properly evaluated, and placed in your hospital for some time. My student has lost all of her family, so I don't believe that she has anyone to care for her, and I believe that it might have triggered all of her violent emotions. She is a ticking time bomb, one that I think would be best to stop sooner than later._

_Best Wishes…"_

I wanted to scream. At Kaien, at the world, at whoever this Dr. Hakudo person was. I wasn't crazy. And I sure as hell wasn't going to be evaluated by some "professional," either. Why was everyone convinced that there was something wrong with me?

And for the first time in what felt like, and what might have very well been years, I curled up into a ball, dropped the letter to the ground, and I started to cry.


	22. Life Starts Now

When I had finished my little cry-fest, a new emotion began to poke through and take control. Anger. I wiped my eyes, picked up the now slightly dirtied letter, and began to rip. And rip. And rip, until there was nothing left but little, tiny pieces. Like my heart. How could he have ever written that stupid letter, anyways? I wasn't crazy. I threw the pieces to the ground, in frustration. When my windows had come in this morning, I had thought things were looking up. I fell for it, because I wanted it so badly to be true. I should have known better though, because good things never happen to me, without consequences later.

The moon was high in the sky before I became aware of myself and my surroundings again. I knew that I should get out of the alleyway, because I heard rats and other tiny creatures scurrying about. On any other day, they wouldn't have bothered me, but right now I couldn't get away fast enough. I stood up on wobbly legs, and made my way back to the street. They were nearly empty now, with only a few people running about, finishing last minute shopping. Homeless people seemed to litter the streets, huddling in doorways and begging for change. I cautiously looked all around me, pleased to see that no one was looking for me. Here, anyways. I couldn't be sure if there was a search party after me, or what.

I shivered, as the night was a chilly one. Not freezing, but definitely not warm, either. The wind was bitter. I ignored it, though, and focused on my major problem on hand. Where to go? It wasn't like I could just waltz back to the Academy, in perfect condition, after deserting Zero and running off with a letter. I wouldn't even have a chance to explain myself. I would just be deemed crazy again, and there would be more evidence pinned against me. I shoved my hands into my pocket, searching for anything. Money, preferably. To my surprise, my hand returned with a few crumpled up bills and assorted low-value coins. I smiled, weakly. It wasn't enough for any motel, that was for sure, but it was enough to buy a cup of ramen or something from the shop I'd been hiding out next to for the entire day. I owed my protection to it, so the least I could do was eat there. I opened the door, which jingled merrily as I walked through. The shop was now nearly empty, besides a man in the corner with a cup of tea. He was reading the newspaper, and didn't look up when I entered.

Hesitantly, I walked up to the counter, and looked over the prices. They were pretty cheap, but I'd still have to get something small. I wasn't sure how long I would have to make this money last, after all. I ordered, and within a few minutes, I had a steaming cup of noodles. I ate it slowly, in an attempt to make it last. But I was hungrier than I'd originally realized, and the cup was empty faster than it had been served to me. I looked down at the empty cup, disappointed it was gone so quickly. My stomach growled in anticipation for more, but I couldn't waste any more of my money here.

When I walked back outside, I was struck with the memory that I still didn't know where to go for the night. Rumble. My head shot up, now alert with the faintest recognition of thunder. Typical, cliché, made-for-TV drama, I know. It wasn't raining, not yet, but I knew it would, because that was simply the way my life ran. I was used to it by now. Rumble. Slightly louder, now. I took cover beneath a door entrance, to a business that was now closed. With a glance, I noticed it to be the post office. Bitter irony, no? I let myself fall to my knees, which hurt, but I didn't notice the pain all that much. Was I really reduced to living on doorsteps? A dark spot appeared on the sidewalk, suddenly. Then another, and another, until a constant rain began falling. I felt more and more alone by the minute.

Lightning flashed, momentarily illuminating the night sky. I shouldn't be out here, I thought. I should be home, under a nice pile of blankets. Not out on the streets. I shut my eyes. Where was the old Midori when I most needed her strength?

She was right here. My eyes widened as I realized that maybe there didn't have to be a fine line. Maybe instead of attempting to change myself entirely, I could just suppress the qualities I didn't like so much. And now, I called upon all of my strength, because I knew it was still there. Just because I'd been trying to cover everything up, didn't mean that I couldn't let myself be the real me once and a while. I sat up straight, feeling stronger already. I could survive this, just like I'd survived everything else in the past. There was no way that I was quitting now. The rain fell harder. But it didn't matter, because however much it rained, it wasn't even going to damage my spirits.

But, that didn't mean that I didn't wish it would stop raining. I curled my knees up to my chest, and watched cars roll carefully past, being extra cautious in the heavy rain. Maybe this wasn't so bad, I decided. It was quiet, and I was finally getting the alone time that I needed. Yeah…everything was fine. I closed my eyes, and listened to the noise. Somewhere in the distance, a police siren wailed. It faded, and left me in what might as well have been complete silence.

"Midori!" I heard someone cry my name, a female voice. Yuuki. I shot up to a standing position, heart thumping away at my chest. They were actually looking for me. There was a moment when I considered that I might actually matter to them after all. That was wishful thinking. Now, if they found me, they'd definitely want me sent away.

"Midori!" Another voice- Zero. My heart ached when I heard him calling for me. I wanted to scream out that I was here. But I couldn't do that. Besides, I didn't even know whether or not Zero had known about the letter. I ran down the street, knowing I'd need a better hiding spot. I rounded a corner, and ran straight into Zero. I almost fell over backwards, but he grabbed my arms and held me upright.

"Thank God Midori…" He began to shout, "Yuu-" I covered his mouth.

"Shh!" I begged. "Don't tell her!" Hesitantly, I removed my hand.

"Where the hell did you run off to?" He demanded to know, still holding onto me. He was upset.

"I…" I was at a loss for words. I looked down. "Can we go somewhere else?" I said, raising my voice over the sound of the rain. I pulled him into an alley. "You don't have an umbrella," I noted, trying to avoid the conversation at all costs.

"Why are you smiling like that?"

"Smiling? Who's-" I realized that a nervous smile had crept across my face while I wasn't paying attention. I immediately turned serious. "Look. I don't know what you knew about the Chairman's plan to send me away, but I swear, I'm just going to disappear, and you aren't going to tell anyone you even saw me." I said, gritting my teeth. My hair was getting completely soaked, and my clothes were just as bad. I'd be freezing cold later, but that was later. This was now.

"What are you…talking about? He was trying to send you away?"

"Yes, he was trying to send me away! He thinks I'm crazy and he wanted me evaluated by a professional!" I cried, glad it was raining so he couldn't tell if my eyes were a little wet.

"Wait…so you opened his mail?"

"That's not important!" I shouted, hitting him on the forehead. Not hard, of course.

"Just calm down for-"

"How can I calm down? Now that you told him I ran away he just as even more of a reason to send me away!" I stamped my foot and turned away from him, unable to face him.

There was a long moment of silence, but he wasn't leaving. He was just standing behind me, the rain getting both of us soaked.

"I didn't tell the Chairman, you know," he said, gently. "I wanted to talk to you first…and Yuuki…well, let's just say I made her swear to secrecy."

I turned around, suddenly feeling like melting. "You didn't…tell him?"

"No. I didn't. Now please, come back to the Academy before I do have to tell him."

I smiled in relief. "Thank you," I said, hugging him quickly.

"Hey! Watch it…you're soaking," he complained.

"So are you," I said, emotionlessly.

But then we shared a smile, and I knew that for today, I'd avoided another crisis.


	23. And Things Get Worse, Again!

"Here's the printer paper you wanted," I said, walking into the Chairman's office, head held high. I dropped the package onto his desk with a thud. He stared at me questioningly.

"What took so long?" He sounded more amused than upset.

I shrugged, and turned away from him. "Doesn't matter, does it? It's here. That's the only thing that matters," I snapped, irritated. It was ten o' clock. I really didn't care though, of course. After all, it was him who had tried to send me away. I figured it didn't really matter all that much whether or not I did what I was supposed to anymore.

"Midori…is everything okay?" He asked, his tone switching to a serious one.

"Everything's fine!" Maybe I sounded too defensive, but that didn't matter to me right now either. "Is my room done yet?" I said, immediately changing the subject before his questions got stranger.

"Actually, yes, but-" I was out of the room before I even heard what the "but" part was. My room was done! Finally, something was right! I nearly flew back to Yuuki and Yori's room. I began packing up my things as soon as I arrived.

"Midori? Is your room done?" Yuuki asked, sitting up in her bed. She'd been sleeping, but somehow she managed to look just as bright and perky as ever.

"Yeah. It's been fun, but I'm out of here," I said sarcastically, throwing my bag over my shoulder.

Yori rubbed at her eyes, looking tired. As soon as I'd mentioned my departure, she looked almost relieved. "You're leaving? That's great! They finished your room?"

I nodded happily. "Later, losers," I mumbled, striding out of the room towards my old dorm. I pulled the key from my pocket. It felt so foreign- so strange. I'd hardly realized how much I missed having a room to myself. I stuck the key into the keyhole, and turned it. The door clicked open, and I danced in, feeling like a giddy little girl again. I threw my bag onto the far bed.

"Ouch!" Someone shrieked.

My good mood faded. I scrambled to flick the light switch on to see the person who was now sitting up in the far bed. My bag had tumbled to the ground, and was now looking rather droopy. But not nearly as droopy as my attitude had become.

"Tawny?" I nearly screamed, but was careful to keep it down. I was courteous enough to let others sleep. "What the hell are you doing in my room?"

She sat up, blonde hair in a tornado, sharp eyes full of sleep, and pink nightgown flowing out around her. When she was fully awake, she gave me a smirk, and stood up, revealing the extreme shortness of her nightgown.

"Well," she started, spinning around in a circle like a wannabe ballerina. "I thought that maybe if we spent some quality time together, it would be good for us." She gave me what would have appeared to be a genuine smile. You probably know that I could tell how fake it was. She twirled a piece of hair around her fingers. "I really am sorry, Midori." She looked at the floor innocently. Probably to hide the deceit in her eyes. "I hope that you learn to trust me." She winked, twirled around again, and crawled back into her bed (stepping on my bag first, of course), a suspicious smile still plastered to her face.

I retrieved my bag, and got changed into my pajamas. Oh boy, was the Chairman going to have a talk with ME tomorrow. I didn't care what it took. I just wanted this girl out of MY room. I went into my own bed, too tired to do anything tonight. I was still seething with anger of course.

Notwithstanding, somehow I managed to fall asleep.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"I. Don't. CARE!" I screamed, slamming my fists down on the Chairman's desk the next day. "I want her OUT!"

"Midori, calm down, calm down…I thought everything was going well with you two!" He said, holding his hands up defensively.

"It isn't that!" I whined in frustration, "I just…like my privacy…" My anger had simmered down slightly, and I crossed my arms. "And I still don't trust her, either way."

"I'm sorry you feel that way, Midori, but I really think it will be good for you both this way."

"But-"

"No more questions, Midori. I'm tired of dealing with your yelling."

"You…you…you…" my anger was boiling right back up again, and I thought for sure that I was going to explode. "You're tired of dealing with my yelling? I'm pretty sure that you're tired of my EVERYTHING!" Tears glittered in my eyes all over again. "I know you tried to get me evaluated by a professional! I know everything! So please, STOP trying to send me away. I'm not crazy! I just HATE it here, I hate everyone here, and I hate everything here! Is that so hard to understand? I'm a TEENAGER, maybe you've failed to notice! And last I checked, it was normal for teenagers to hate everything. I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy! I'M NOT CRAZY!" I screamed, falling to my knees.

Silence.

The Chairman pushed up his glasses. After a while, he finally said, "You're absolutely right. Maybe I am taking this too far."

My head shot up, and I was shocked at what I was hearing. No argument? There was always an argument. "R-really?"

He sighed, "I really, really think that you should be evaluated, but since you haven't seemed to have made any attempt at your life lately, I think I can trust you. For now, of course. But as for the Tawny matter…she's going to stay put."

I stood up, so as to try to leave with some sense of dignity. "Fine."

"You never know. Maybe you two will become friends."

"Yeah," I said, sarcastically, but he didn't seem to notice, "Maybe."

Not.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"Hey Lily," I said sweetly, burying my face in her thick mane. "You know I'm not crazy, right?"

She snorted in response, but I chose to take it as a yes, mostly because I needed some encouragement more than ever. It had been hours since I'd actually cleaned the stalls, but I'd come back around eleven at night just to spend some time away from the Wicked Witch of the West Coast of America. She was a terrible snorer.

"I know I'm not supposed to be here, but you don't mind, huh?" I carefully gave Lily a treat I'd brought with me, some carrots from my dinner. She ate them up gratefully. "Oh who am I kidding? You just like me because I feed you." I sat down on a bale of hay, defeated. Lily nudged my shoulder. "I don't have any more food, hun," I said, gently pushing her nose away. She took the hint, and presently began to munch on my hair.

"Cut that out! That's not edible…" I cried, standing up. She snorted as if she didn't believe me. I guess to a horse, everything was food.

"Midori? What are you doing here?" A voice asked, surprised.

It was Zero. I felt my heart rate shoot upwards. "Erm…nothing. I just…needed to get out, is all. Are you okay? You look kind of…sick."

He looked terrible, though it pained me to say so. He looked paler than usual, and he looked weak. After my question, he hurriedly shook his head. "No. I'm fine. Just…haven't been getting enough sleep is all." His voice sounded strained, as if he was in pain.

"Are you sure?" I asked, walking over to him and gently putting a hand to his forehead. I'd expected it to be hot- but instead it was freezing cold. He hit my hand away, and I took a step back, surprised. "I'm sorry…I just…"

"I didn't mean to hit you," he responded quickly, "Why is your heart beating so fast?" He asked softly, taking a step closer. I felt blood rush to my face. How could he have possibly known that? Was it really that loud? Or was it really that quiet in the barn? I felt one of his hands touch my cheek. "Your bruises are healing."

"Y-yeah. I guess," I said, shoving my hands into my sweatshirt pockets. I was in my pajamas, a sweatshirt, and a beat-up pair of sneakers. The same sneakers that I'd warn to the dance. I stared at them, trying to stop the eternal blush that had built up in my cheeks.

"Are you scared?" He whispered, pulling me into him.

"Why would I be scared?" I asked, a nervous laugh following. I wasn't scared, but I felt extremely anxious. He was acting strangely- even for Zero. We were so close. I was embarrassed. "I don't get scared." I looked up into his eyes, with more confidence than I actually had.

His eyes were glowing, though, a red color that very much resembled the color of blo-


	24. Shock

"Zero…" I whispered, unable to believe my eyes. A…vampire? But that couldn't be! There was no way…he couldn't be a vampire. He…he hated vampires. Was he really such a hypocrite? I was dreaming. I had to be dreaming. I must have fallen asleep when I'd come to the barn…there was just no way that this was possible! Right now, I needed to protect myself, dream or not. I shoved away from Zero, giving myself some sort of distance. The problem was, he was blocking the door, so there was absolutely no way that I could escape. "Pull yourself together!" I stammered, finding myself backed up against a wall. This was not good. This was a horrible nightmare, that I needed to wake up from…now.

He approached me, and put one of his hands on either side of the wall around me, trapping me between the wall and his body. Suddenly we were kissing again- but this wasn't one of those little awkward kisses we'd exchanged. This was a passionate one, driven by bloodlust. His tongue was at my lips, trying desperately to part them. I wasn't going to give in that easily, though. I would play his little game, for now anyways. And maybe in the end, I'd die, and get what I'd wanted from the beginning. After all, that was what I'd wanted, wasn't it? There had been a point in time where I'd taken a razor to my skin just to make sure that my blood was still there…that I was still alive…that I still had feeling.

This was different though, wasn't it? This wasn't what I'd wanted. I'd wanted to die by my own hand, when I decided. Not because I was killed. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, though, dying by a vampire. Maybe it would be quicker than anything I'd tried before, and less painful. I felt a fang poking into my lip, and I opened my mouth to cry out. Faster than that though, his tongue was in my mouth, and I was at a loss. Even though this was hardly a romantic situation, I'd never felt more amazing in my entire life. I found myself returning the kiss, completely infatuated with his scent, and his taste, and his body…

Without realizing it, I had been running my hands along his chest, feeling his muscles and sending my hormones on a rampage. Oh, this was perfect…this was all so perfect…even though he was licking the blood off of my lip, I was so lost in the moment that everything felt just fine. Perfectly normal. As if there was nothing out of the ordinary with this…

He grabbed both of the sides of my head, and laced his fingers into my hair. I shut my eyes, placing my hands on top of his. There was nothing more on this planet that I wanted besides him. His hands slowly slid down my head, pulling my hair. It didn't hurt, though. They slid down past my neck and down my chest, making me shiver in delight. I let my own hands fall to my sides. Where'd my self control go? I knew this was wrong…and that if I didn't stop him…

Zero pulled away from my mouth and nuzzled his face into my neck. I snapped my shoulders up as a natural reaction, but he pushed them down with his hands just as fast. No…this had to stop here…before…before he…

I felt his tongue licking at my neck, which tickled and made me almost laugh out loud. Until he bit down suddenly. My eyes snapped open, and I was at full control of myself again. Why hadn't I stopped this earlier? Why had I let this go on? I desperately attempted to shove him away, only to fail. He was holding me exceptionally tightly now, something that even I couldn't escape. Why was he doing this? Why hadn't he told me about this before? Because he was ashamed, obviously, but a warning would have been nice…

I needed to do something about this. I felt a streak of warm blood running down my neck and down my chest beneath my clothes. Once, the blood had been a sign of life. It had been a sign of self-assurance. I'd known that I was still feeling, still breathing, and still alive. Now, though, I felt myself losing life, losing hope, and filling up with anger. I kicked his shin with all that I had. He hardly flinched, though, and I knew then that I was done for. "Stop it!" I shouted, not giving up, and still trying to shove him away. "You need to stop it."

Just then, he was pulled away from me by two figures, and pushed to the ground. I fell backwards, landing on my butt. One of the figures extended a hand to me. "Well lookee here. If it isn't Midori. Word is you aren't as tough as you used to me."

I slapped the hand away. "Hanabusa," I growled, "Get lost."

"Is that really any way to treat someone who just saved your life?" He asked in a bored voice.

"I can take care of myself," I said, even though I wasn't so sure anymore.

He smiled, gently bending down and helping me up anyways. "I like your attitude, you know. It's cute. You act so tough. But are you, really?" He laughed. "Don't worry. We'll deal with your little boyfriend here. The Chairman likes him, so with luck, he'll be fine. As for you…will you be fine? You've been getting beaten up an awful lot lately."

"I'll be fine! I don't need your help!" I cried, shoving him away. "Now go jump off a bridge, and do me a favor." I looked to the other student with him, the one who was holding Zero. Zero had grown conscious of himself again, and he was looking at me with sad eyes. Even though I was pretty pissed off at him, I still couldn't bring myself to hate him. "I'll help him back to his room, okay? If either of you care about your well-being, I suggest that you tell no one of this." I gave them both my best glare.

Aidou's eyes widened, "I don't get it…why don't you want us to tell anyone?"

"Because. I owe him," I whispered.

"You're…interesting Midori, you know that?" Aidou said, grabbing my chin and holding my head up. "I definitely need to talk to you again." He took my hand, and kissed it. "I make a promise."

"Get away from me you creep," I said, hitting him. "Come on Zero." I took his arm, and brought him back to his room.

"Why aren't you mad at me?" Zero asked, sitting on his bed and looking at the floor.

"Don't flatter yourself," I said blankly, wiping off his face and neck with a washcloth. I'd already cleaned myself up. But Zero seemed to be in some kind of a trance, unable to move or take care of himself. "Of course I'm mad at you. I'm just going to be mature about this, for once in my life, because you saved me a lot of trouble when you didn't tell anyone that I ran away. So now we're even."

I took off his jacket and shirt, trying to be casual about it. "I'll drop these off in the laundry room on my way out. They aren't that badly stained. So they won't be that suspicious." I was mostly in shock, myself, so maybe that was why I wasn't as upset as I should have been.

"Midori, I'm sorry."

"You better be." I didn't know what else I could say besides that. I was angry- but…I was so angry, that I couldn't express it properly. Because…even though Zero was a vampire…I was fairly certain that I was in love with him. And yelling at him would just hurt me…especially when he was already looking so down. I took a deep breath. "Well, I'm not going to lie. I am pissed at you," I said truthfully, gritting me teeth and glaring at him. "But…friendship is about forgiveness, right? So…I forgive you." It was an odd sensation, hearing those words come out of my mouth. But I meant them.

"That's more than I deserve, you know."

"Oh, believe me…I know," I said. "But for now…WHY THE HECK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS BEFORE?" I put my hands on my hips. Where had that sudden flare of anger come from?

"Because. I didn't want you to know. That's why."

"At least if I'd had a warning, I might have been able to prevent that from happening!" I protested, stamping one of my feet. I must have really lost it. I was so upset with him all of the sudden…I was so tired of holding everything in. Now was a really bad time to let it out, but I couldn't take it anymore. "Now Aidou and company are going to tell someone about this!" I cried. Was I upset, or worried?

"Good. Maybe they'll finally kill me."

"Don't say that! Don't you ever say that! If I can't wish death on myself, then let my say that neither can you! Can't you see that I'm just worried about you?"

"You should go back to your room, Midori."

"What?" I asked, feeling slightly insulted, "Why?"

"Because. You're being loud. You aren't supposed to be here, you know."

"I don't care! This is important!"

"Just go to bed, Midori. Get yourself some rest. Your body needs it- especially now." Zero stood up, and grabbed my arm. "I'm surprised you aren't more upset with me, and after this, you probably will be, but…" he pushed me out of his room, grabbing his shirt and jacket, "Don't worry. I'll take care of these. Just leave me alone." He shut the door.

"Zero, wait!" I cried, banging on his door.

"Just go to bed, Midori! Stop trying to make this better."

I opened my mouth, determined to have the last word. Except I didn't bother. Because he didn't want me there any longer, and I had to respect that. "Goodnight, Zero," I whispered. It was probably the last time I'd be able to think of him without hate. Tomorrow morning I would probably be consumed by rage, once the shock faded away. Defeated, I returned to my dorm, back to Tawny's miserable snoring.


	25. Missing

"Well, you sure are back late, hmm?" Tawny asked, waking up from her sleep. "Or…should I say early?"

"Um…yeah. I guess," I said, glancing at the clock. One in the morning. I yawned. "Relax, I've been here the entire time, though. I just went to the bathroom a little while ago." I lied through my teeth, but if you couldn't tell, I wasn't in the mood for dealing with her. The whole shock of the incident was wearing off now, and my anger was bubbling up inside of me now.

"Oh…were you? Because I remember waking up some time, like, by some time I mean like an hour- ago, and your bed was…empty. And, well, let's face it. If you had just gone to the bathroom, then may I ask why your pants are wet?" She said, pointing to the bottom of my pants, which were wet from tramping through grass.

I caught my breath. If Tawny was nothing else- she was smart. She wasn't easily fooled, I had to give her that much. Maybe I was underestimating her by assuming that she was simply another dumb blonde. I felt a defeated smile make its way across my face with the last of my energy. "Right. Of course you'd notice that," I looked at the ground, hoping she wouldn't notice the blood that had soaked into my clothes.

"Woah," she said suddenly, mouth dropping open as she flicked on the bedside light. "That is one hell of a hickey, Midori."

Oh, no. She'd noticed the bite. No, no. No no no no no no no no no! I couldn't let her see that I was nervous, though. She just had to think exactly what she already thought. She didn't know it was a vampire bite, and as long as she assumed that I'd just been playing a little rough with my boyfriend tonight, then everything would be fine, no? Well, halfway fine anyways. Sure, she would have some serious ammo against me in the social world that I'd suddenly found myself at the inner circle of through endless fights and unfortunate events. But it was a lot better than having her going around blabbing that Zero was a vampire, that was for sure.

"You don't miss a thing, now do you?" I asked, giving her a glare. "What I do with boys, however, is none of your business. Make of that what you will." I climbed into my bed before she could say anything more on the subject.

"I'll never understand you," Tawny spat, with an overdramatic sigh.

"You wouldn't be the first person to say that," I said into my pillow. "Now please, give me some sanity and shut up, will you? I'd like to have some sleep tonight." I was ready to begin the silence of the night, until something else occurred to me. "Hey, Tawny, by the way, if you tell anyone about this, than you will wake up a very sorry little witch one morning. Got it?" I meant every word of that. Nobody messed with me without consequence.

"Whatever," was the last sound I heard from her. Well, aside from the snoring.

I could have done without the attitude. She was just digging her grave deeper with me, let me tell you. It seemed like every second that she was breathing, I was hating her more.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

The next morning, I woke up very confused, and very sore. My head was aching, my neck was stinging, and I just wanted to stay in bed. But I had class, so staying in bed wasn't an option. Tawny was already gone, probably in the bathroom taking her three hour long shower. I looked at myself in the mirror, only to find myself looking like I'd fallen in a hole and hadn't come out for a year. I dragged a comb through my hair, which helped my case a lot. There were still dark rims under my eyes, though. And there were still two puncture marks, red and small, that were pretty visible. Ugly. I was ugly. Almost ugly enough to want to slit my throat and skip school for the rest of my pathetic high school life. Certainly enough to avoid Zero. I was definitely angry enough at him now to have the urge to slap him. Under normal circumstances, I would have wanted to kick him and scream at him and tell him that he was the biggest idiot I had ever met.

But love was not normal circumstances. And by some miracle, I wasn't angry with him. Some part of me…well, oddly enough, the majority of me, sympathized with him. Why this was I can never be certain. My only explanation was, again, love. And even that just didn't seem to match up with me. What was I turning into?

I pulled on my uniform, dreading going to class. I dragged my feet as I walked around the room, preparing myself for the day that would ultimately end in tragedy.

However, when I walked into my first class, Zero wasn't there. My heart skipped a beat. Was he just late? Or… was he…avoiding me now? I took my seat, relieved I wouldn't have to face him today. I didn't think I could do it, with my emotions so undecided. I was angry, and I was worried at the same time. Why hadn't he come to class today?

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"Zero!" I slammed on his door, ignoring the looks I got from the other students who were milling about the dorm hall. I wasn't supposed to be in the male dorm, not even in the day, but it didn't seem as though anyone was willing to oppose me, either. "I need to talk to you."

No response. There was nothing but absolute silence from the other side of the door.

"Zero?" I tried again, some of the determination gone from my voice. Now I was more worried, than angry. What if he…what if he'd…done something that couldn't be taken back? I felt my heart stop beating. What if he'd…what if he'd…no…he wouldn't…would he?

Was this how they'd felt when I'd tried to kill myself?

I jiggled the door handle. Locked. I threw my hands up in the air, out of options. "Zero, if you're in there, at least give me some sign of life. Let me know you're okay!" I slammed my fists on his door with such a force, that the entire dorm went dead silent. Everyone was looking at me, now. "What are you all looking at?" I screamed, dashing out of the male dorms. Maybe he wasn't there. There was no need to panic, right? There were lots of other places he could be…he didn't have to be in his room. He didn't have to be in his room.

The stables. Maybe he'd be there. He seemed to turn up there an awful lot, lately…

I searched Lily's stall, but I didn't find him. Where else would he be? I couldn't think. He had to be somewhere though, right? He wasn't dead. He wasn't in his room. He couldn't be. No. There was no way. When I turned around, ready to leave, I saw a comforting sight, and I had never been more happy in my entire life, to see Zero standing there.

Until I realized that it wasn't Zero. But…there was no other explanation, either…unless…this was…a twin? I felt a brief surge of anger. Just another thing he hadn't told me.

"Who are you?" I asked, shocked. Oh, this was just getting better and better.

He smiled, an eerie, discomforting smirk. "I'm Ichiru Kiryuu. And may I say that, my brother has extremely good taste in girls these days."


	26. Exposed

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, on my guard.

"Oh, nothing much. I'm just glad he's been hanging around someone a little more in his league. After all, that Yuuki girl...she's pretty, but let's face it. She acts like a preschooler sometimes, am I wrong? And...somehow, Kaname Kuran shows interest in her. My brother never would have been with her. She had...higher expectations. You, however, are different. Nothing special. Average."

I grunted, "Maybe you're right, but it doesn't mean you have to point it out to me."

"I think you're taking this the wrong way," he said, stepping forward. "You're pretty, of course- and scary too. You have a quick temper, from what I've noticed. Now, I haven't been following you or anything, but I have been following my brother. And you just happen to be around. But truly, I think you're just fine for my brother. And if I didn't already love someone- I do believe I might be interested in you myself. That's not the case of course. And, I'm sorry, by the way, that I think in the end I just might have to kill your precious Zero."

"Has anyone ever told you you talk to much?" I asked, bored, not even slightly worried over his pathetic threats. "Because you do, you know that?" I pushed past him, and he grabbed my shoulder as I walked past.

"No, actually. You're the first. But it doesn't matter to me, considering I was going to just kill you anyways." He drew a sword from a sheath I hadn't noticed.

"You've...got to be joking," I said, mouth hanging open.

"It isn't like I want to...but understand, this is just payback to my brother for everything he's taken from me."

I smirked, and looked at the floor. "That isn't what I meant. I meant, that you have got to be psychotic if you think you can lay a finger- or a sword- on me."

"What makes you so confident that I can't?" He asked.

"Because I can tell that in your eyes, you aren't a killer at heart, now are you? You've never killed before. And you're afraid of killing. I can see it in your eyes."

His eyes opened wider, "I can kill easily. I doubt you should be one to question me, since I have a sword to your throat." He did indeed have a blade held to my throat now, and he was holding me up against his chest with an arm around my waist.

"Well, than in that case..." I squirmed, and managed to get an arm free, which I used to deflect the blade as it came down suddenly, and then I grabbed it with my hand. It hurt like you couldn't imagine, but I managed to pull it out of his hands and halfway across the barn. I ran, as fast as I could, back to my dorm room. My arm was bleeding, my hand was bleeding, and I expected to get another visit from the guidance office very, very soon. The sensation of the cuts was a familiar one, one I'd felt when I'd done it intentionally. However, this was a completely different situation, and I knew that if I didn't do something about them fast, I'd be in some serious trouble.

"What happened to you? Get your arm caught in a blender did you?" Tawny sneered, brushing her hair.

"Cute," I said, sucking in a breath through my teeth. "You just think you're so great..." I grabbed one of her shirts that she'd carelessly tossed on top of the dresser, and I wrapped it around my arm.

"Hey! That's my shirt!" She protested, but I didn't listen to her, nor did I care.

"And now it needs to be washed. I thought you were my friend. Didn't you say you got along with me? So doesn't that make us friends now? And last I checked, friends were concerned about their friends when their arms were just torn to shreds."

She smirked, and crawled off of her bed, and skipped over to me, hair bouncing behind her. "Let me get something straight with you," she said, ripping the shirt from my arm and clenching her teeth together in disgust, "Just because I apologized to you doesn't make us friends. Are we clear now?" She looked away from me, and held the shirt out in front of her, cringing at the sight of my blood ruining her pink blouse. Tch. American girls. "Look at what you've done! This shirt is beyond hope..." she sighed, and threw the blouse into the trash. "That was my favorite shirt!"

"Please," I said, rolling my eyes and holding my arm, "You've got plenty more."

"I only have twenty three more shirts!" She cried, "That's unacceptable. You owe me a new shirt, or else!"

"Only twenty three, huh? _Only _twenty three? You wear a _uniform_ 99% of the time! Why the hell do you need _twenty three_ shirts?" I was blowing up now. I didn't say hell, either, I used a more colorful word. Use your imagination.

"How can you be so inconsiderate?" She said, mouth hanging open like her jaw was broken. Oh, and believe me, her jaw was about to be broken in a minute. "You're just jealous because you don't have half as many as I do."

"You're calling _me_ inconsiderate?" I cried, feeling my face turning red, "Pardon me for being a little worried that my arm has a quarter of an inch wide gash in it!"

"Oh suck it up! You probably did it on purpose! All you want is attention!" She screamed, stamping her foot.

"Attention? I'm trying to avoid attention! You're the whiny little attention leech! You're jealous because the attention isn't on you all the time anymore!"

She looked genuinely insulted, but embarrassed too, as if I'd seen right through her. Which I had. "I don't care about that," she said, suddenly quiet as a mouse. Not a mouse. Mice were too gentle to be compared to Tawny. No. Tawny was a rat.

"Oh, right. That's it. You don't care about attention at all. Silly me. Silly, silly, silly me. But...then...let's see? Why are you so upset with your false notion that I want attention? Why are you all worked up over this? Because I'm right. I'm right, and you just don't want to admit you're wrong."

Tawny was blushing hard now. "Stop assuming things. I'm just tired of you, is all."

"Then why did you want to room with me, Princess Tawny? So you could pretend that you were all nice and sweet and kind to everyone? Well let me tell you, you haven't fooled me. You may have everyone else in the world fooled, but I see through you. And I think that you just can't handle that! I must say, that you're smarter than I took you for, but that doesn't mean you aren't a horrible person. And let me tell you, that I'm not just tired of you, I'm sick of you. Sick with the black plague, of you for that matter."

She was quiet for a moment, as if she didn't remember what the black plague was, but she was smart enough to know that 'black' and 'plague' probably weren't good words together. "Well you aren't exactly the greatest person to be around either!" She said, holding up a fist. I knew that she probably wouldn't use it, but still.

"You. Are. The. Most. Insufferable. Person. I have ever had the displeasure of knowing!"

"Big words don't make you sound smart you know!" She said, taking my drawer of the dresser, and pulling it all the way out, throwing it on the floor, and tossing my clothing around the room.

"No, but at least I have a vocabulary that's more advanced than a second grader! And by the looks of how you're reacting, I have a maturity level above a second grader's as well!" I screamed, taking her jewelry box and dumping all of its contents on the ground. I watched an earring fall into the heating vent, and smirked.

"My diamond earring!" She screeched, falling to the floor beside the vent and pressing her palms against it. "You...you...my...earring!" She began to wail. Then she stood up again, and began to rip the sheets off of my bed. I followed up by dumping all of her clothes out of the dresser, and ripping open her feather pillows...and...and...

"Just so you know, it was me who destroyed your room last time. And I enjoyed every single second of it, because I hate you! I hate that you took my boyfriend away from me! It's all your fault!" She was sobbing now, and it was such a pitiable sight that I almost felt bad for her.

"I know you did! That was pretty obvious after you ruined my chemistry experiment!" I broke the heels off of one pair of her shoes.

"Girls! Stop this right now!" An adults voice ordered us. We both dropped what we were destroying, and looked to the door.

Tawny gasped, realizing what that meant for her. She stood up, brushed herself off, and straightened her ruffled clothing. "C-Ch-Chairman!" She cried, bowing quickly. I picked myself up from the floor, not wanting to be outdone by

her. "Midori was just...just..."

"Please, miss Gold. I heard everything. Don't try and dig yourself out of your grave now. Save yourself the trouble." He pushed his glasses up his nose, and looked away from us. "Come to my office, now."

"See!" I cried, pointing at her, "I told you, and you wouldn't believe me! I told you she was evil!"

"Midori, please. Don't think that you aren't in trouble as well. I need you to come with me too."

My little fire of victory was extinguished. But...still. Tawny was exposed, wasn't she? I just wondered how long it would take her before she saved herself.


	27. Sentence

I cringed as the nurse rubbed disinfectant on my wounds. I was sitting in the Chairman's office, listening to his lecture, which would undoubtedly end with me getting expelled. I wasn't paying much if any attention to the words coming out of his mouth. Instead, I was paying much more attention to the nurse at my side who was patching up my arm. After all, pain was almost a surefire attention-grabber, no? Tawny was sitting beside me, perfect cherry-colored lips in a well-defined pout. The rest of her had gotten...more than a little messed up in our fight. Her hair was still gorgeous, but slightly less perfect. Her clothes were wrinkled too, something I never expected to see on Tawny of all people. She looked, really, really pissed off, and I was secretly pleased with myself.

"Midori, I have been very, very patient with you...but this has to stop! I find myself in a very difficult situation, though. I am technically your legal guardian, so I can't expel you, like the rules of the school would normally require."

I sighed in relief. I was safe- for now, anyways.

"As for you, Miss Gold- since this is your first offense...I'm going to let you off with a warning, and three weeks of remedial classes. And we'll see if we can get your earring back." She turned to me and smirked. I was a bit upset that she wasn't getting kicked out, but there was nothing I could do about it. At least she wasn't going entirely unpunished. The nurse finished my arm, bowed her head to the Chairman quickly, and left.

"Thank you," Tawny said softly, instantly transformed from devious witch to innocent angel. "If it isn't too much to ask, I'd like to move back into my old room."

The Chairman sighed, "Let's just see what happens. For now, got and start picking up your room, all right? I have something I need to talk about privately with Midori."

I swallowed a lump in my throat. A private talk under most circumstances wasn't a good thing. Tawny nodded, gave me one last evil little smirk, and skipped out of the office, like nothing bad had ever happened. When the door closed, I turned my attention back to the Chairman. "So...what is this about?" I asked, playing with the bandages on my arm and hand.

"You've been cutting again?" He asked, gesturing to my arm. "I thought everything was going fine, at least in that aspect of your life. Yuuki even told me she suspected there was something going on between Zero and you. But that isn't any of my business." He gave a gentle smile, one that made me suspicious. "What is my business, though, is your mental health."

Uh-oh. Little warning bells began ringing in my head. I didn't like where this conversation was going one little bit. "I haven't been cutting!" I cried defensively. "I was attacked by-"

"Midori, please. I am very, very tired of hearing your outlandish stories."

"You're tired of hearing them. Really? Every time I try to tell you one you never let me talk or you don't believe me. So I'm tired of telling them, in that case."

"As I was saying earlier. I've been very patient with you. But clearly, ignoring all of your problems isn't going to work anymore. I called Yoshio's Psychiatric Hospital. Dr. Hakudo, in particular. And...since my letter never reached him...I told him about you. And we decided that it would be best if you went into a three month program there."

"Oh, so you can't expel me, so this is your alternative?" I cried, standing up and accidentally tipping my chair over. "This isn't fair! I'm not crazy!"

The Chairman looked noticeably uncomfortable. "Hurting yourself isn't normal, Midori. I'm sorry, but you're sick. And I want so badly for you to get better. I see now that I should have done this a long time ago."

I didn't know what to say. I was horrified. Completely and totally horrified. "N-no...I can't! I'm not sick!" I backed up against the back wall, shaking my head, trying to clear it. No. No, no, no.

"I'm sorry, Midori. But arrangements have already been made. You leave tomorrow morning. And...well, just so you don't try anything...Yuuki has promised to stand watch outside your door all night."

Traitor. That stupid little traitor.

"I hate you!" I screamed, running out of his office. I ran outside, and hid behind the fountain. I curled up into a ball, and I cried. It was a nice, good, long cry, something I hadn't done in a while. It was like everything I'd never cried for was now coming back to haunt me.

"Midori?" Zero asked, from somewhere nearby. "What...happened?"

"And may I ask where you've been all day?" I snapped. "I was worried sick."

"I asked the question first," he said, sitting down beside me. "What happened? Did Tawny do something?"

"No!" I screamed, looking away from him. I didn't want him to see me like this. Not in a moment of weakness. "Don't look at me."

"Just tell me what happened."

"They're...sending me away," I said, crying into my knees. It was hopeless, trying to conceal my tears from him now. "To...a mental hospital. But...I'm not crazy...I'm not...I'm not...I'm not," my voice was breaking and cracking, a mirror image of my heart.

"They're...what?" He cried, and I felt him tense up beside me. "Who the hell does he think he is?"

"My guardian," I said dully, finding myself under control again. I wasn't crying anymore, so that was the positive note in all of this.

"Are you...coming back?" He asked gently, and for the first time, I heard him genuinely worried.

"Three months...that's what he told me...but I don't know. I'm not sure if I can take it there. It's just...way too much to deal with!"

There was a long moment of silence.

"Midori, can I tell you something?" He said, taking my bandaged hand and inspecting it carefully. I could tell from the look in his eyes that he was fearing the worst.

"I suppose. I doubt it would make me feel better."

"You're right. It probably won't," he shrugged. "But when I first knew you, you were quiet, and I sort of just found it easier to forget you were there. There was so much pain- and everyone could tell- that it was contagious. So...I tried to just block you out. But then...I don't know what happened. But you changed, suddenly. And suddenly, even if you got angry, it was over the right things. I like this you much better. But I don't like your sadness. That is the one thing that I want to be changed about you. I want you to be happy. So please, go to this hospital without a fight. And learn to be happy. Don't let them break your spirits though. Just do one thing, and learn to be happy."

"You're right."

"Of course. No one can be miserable forever, you know." I felt like telling him to look in a mirror, but I didn't. His problems were much bigger than mine, so different rules applied.

"No. That isn't what I meant. I meant that you were right, that didn't make me feel any better."

He didn't respond to that. "Whatever you do...please make an attempt to be happy. If that requires a life without me, then that's perfectly all right. Just...be good, okay?"

"You're scaring me," I said bluntly.

"Why?"

"Because. You're too out of character."

"I don't stay in between the lines of what people define me as. Remember that about yourself, too. You might just surprise people."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

I carried my suitcase out to the black car with as much dignity as I could muster up. Someone offered to take my suitcase, but I chose to put it in the trunk myself. Then I slid into the back seat of the car, and couldn't help but notice the security locks on the doors. It was possibly one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. Zero wasn't there to see me off- because I'd asked him not to. I told him that I didn't want him to see me dragged away to a hospital for the mentally ill. I wanted his last memory of me to be the kiss and hug we'd shared last night, instead of me being taken away. Within minutes, I was driving away from the school I hated. If I'd been going anywhere but a crazy house, I might have been happy.

With luck, three months would fly by.

But if you hadn't noticed, luck was never on my side. So I wasn't holding my breath or anything.


	28. Zero

My name is Zero Kiryuu, and exactly a week ago, the girl who I loved was taken to a mental hospital. She's supposed to get better there, that's what everyone keeps telling me, anyways. I can't believe it though, not until she's back with me again. I don't know how I fell in love with her, or why...but she was perhaps the most influential person in my life. Because of her, I was able to suppress whatever feelings I'd had for Yuuki. It's been a week. A week. I just can't convince myself that she'll come back a better person. She's too strong willed for that, as if she doesn't want anyone changing her. And the truth is, I don't want her to change. There's something about the way she holds herself, and her not-taking-your-pathetic-crap attitude that completely won me over. Usually, I'm not one to fall for girls. I find them annoying, materialistic, whiny, and clingy. Not to mention a whole list of other insulting traits. Midori is different though, and everyone knows that.

When I first met her, I couldn't stand to be around her. She was mostly invisible, and it was easier to just let her fade into the background. I knew her name and her face, but she was just the type of person your brain tells you to stay clear of. I didn't hate her- she was just another person in my life, who made no big impact on me. Then she began to have the strangest episodes of anger. She wasn't afraid to stand up for herself, despite how shy she may have seemed. This surprised me, and I found myself intrigued. I couldn't tell you what had changed her, but she was different. I couldn't tell you how we became friends. I couldn't tell you how I fell in love with her, and I couldn't tell you how long I tried to avoid it.

Then, when she got into that fight with whats-his-name, I thought for sure she would beat his brains out. Instead, she did the complete opposite. I shouldn't have assumed things, but it had seemed like the likely thing to do. I'd almost helped her then, but then I smelled the blood...and I had to get out of there. I wish I'd told her that reason for leaving before she left for the hospital.

There was a brief period of time where I even thought that maybe I could make her feel better. I thought that I could make her happy, and make it better. It was foolish, but by then I was so far infatuated with her I wasn't really thinking. When I bit her that night, I'd wanted so badly to take my life. But then I was left with the cancerous question with whether or not she'd try to follow me. I miss her now, to an unhealthy extent. I never realized how much I could actually care for someone- especially a female. I'd never want her, or anyone else, to know this, of course. What goes on in my head is my business only. Other people hardly need to know what I'm truly feeling. In all honesty, showing emotion is like showing a weak spot. A weak spot is where people tend to target you. In fact, I sometimes wish I never had a weak spot at all. If I kept on sulking around like this, then someone was bound to notice it. Well...if I kept on sulking around more than usual.

I was told that Midori wouldn't be able to contact me while she was in the hospital. Apparently because they aren't sure if I'm a bad influence on her or not. Hn. I may not be the most sociable, fun-loving boy, but I sure as hell was certain that I wasn't the cause of her pain. I don't even know if she knew the cause of her pain half of the time.

All I could do for now was sit back, get through each day, and hope that three months would be over soon. Three months without her. I knew for a fact that I could live without her, after all, she wasn't my life, but things would be a little duller around the Academy...that was a fact.

When I got back to my dorm room after doing some of my never-ending guardian duties, I noticed a note pushed halfway under my door. I bent over, and picked it up. It was a note, written in elegant script that I could hardly read. What was this person writing, a note or a Constitution?

_Dear Zero-kun._

_ This is Tawny. I'd really enjoy it if we could talk somewhere tonight, if you wouldn't mind. I really need to talk to you about Midori. It's important. I promise, no funny business, I'm being serious. If you're interested...meet me by the fountain, eleven-thirty sharp. If you aren't interested, that's all right too._

_ Xoxoxoxo, Tawny Gold_

For someone who spend most of her time using an eyeliner pencil than an actually pencil, I was appalled by her handwriting. She just had to be perfect in everything, didn't she? I knew that it was probably a bad idea to listen to anything she had to say, but at the same time...I was curious. I threw the note into the trash, and smirked. It was eleven now, so all I'd have to do was wait around a while. "All right Tawny, fine. I'll play your game for now." But any sign of funny business, and I was going to report her in a heartbeat for being out past curfew.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"What do you want?" I grumbled, hands in my pockets. I glared down at her. She was wearing a short skirt, a tank top that revealed much more than I wanted to see, and high heels. She looked like a stripper. The heavy makeup made her look complete. Apparently, uniforms didn't apply to her. The vampire side of me had a very, very different opinion, though...

I shook my head, forcing myself to think of other things.

"Well...nothing much," she said, twirling her hair around her finger. "Like I said. I wanted to talk to you about Midori."

"Then talk," I said, bored. "And hurry it up, would you?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Okay, fine. Well, before she left, she talked to me about you. She said that the only reason she was pretending to like you was because she was desperate. But, everyone knows that she's liked Kaname Kuran, like, forever."

"That's insane." I couldn't help but feel a tiny seed of doubt be planted in my mind. "Midori isn't like that. And even if she was, I know for certain that she wouldn't talk to _you_ about her problems."

"Zero-kun, please. We aren't enemies, you know. Midori and I actually became pretty close friends. Like, not BFFs or anything, but we had a trust thing going between us." She changed her position so that her chest looked bigger. I continued looking at her eyes, not interested in her pathetic attempts to get my hormones raging. It wasn't working.

"If you have any self-respect, you'd cut the slut act."

Her eyes widened in anger, but she immediately held it back. She was a decent actress, I had to give her credit. "I'm not...oh never mind," she smiled quickly, "You could always see through me, couldn't you?"

"The only thing I'm seeing through is your lies."

"What? Lies? Oh...well the truth was, Midori was only being nice to you so she could help me get to you...that whole scene at the dance? We both planned it...you know." Suddenly, she stood up, and the short length of the skirt was even more apparent now. She took a few slow steps towards me, and gave me what I assumed was supposed to be a seductive look. I was completely unfazed by it. Then, she wrapped her arms around my neck. "Zero-kun, please. Don't you want to be with a normal girl? A girl that isn't sick? I could give you so much more than she ever could!"

"Get off of me," I groaned, pushing her off of me. "I'm not buying this story one little bit, so you can give it up."

"Zero, wait. I want to show you something that Midori wrote...if you don't believe me...then please, read her journal," Tawny held out a small black book to me. "It's hers. It repeats everything that I just said."

I quickly leafed through it. It was a fake, no surprise. "I can't believe you," I said, tossing the book into the fountain. "You do realize that your handwriting is easy to recognize? The diary was obviously forged."

Tawny pouted, but was actually angry, not sad. "All right then, Zero-kun. I guess you leave me no choice." Suddenly, she whipped out a syringe, and jammed it into my arm.

"What the freaking hell did you just do to me?" I shouted, slapping her across the face.

"What? Oh nothing...I just think that you'll feel a lot differently about me once you wake up..." She laughed, an evil, tinkling laugh, and skipped away. I fell to the ground, dizzy. What was...what did she just shoot into me? When I was through with her...she would be...she would be...she...would...b...


	29. Friends

Today. Today I was going to be out of this place for good, and today I would be back to see Zero, and everything would work out. Hell, I even missed Yuuki. I missed all of my classmates (excluding Tawny), and I couldn't wait to get back into the classroom routine. I might have hated school before, but if there was one thing that being in the hospital had made me grateful for, it was school. Anything was better then this place. I was constantly talking to counselors, or having mini group talks with the other people here, or having private tutoring so I wouldn't fall behind. This place made school seem like a walk in the park.

At first, when I first arrived, things had been complicated. I refused to speak, and I was on a hunger strike as well. Then they'd threatened to tack on an extra week here, and I had to learn to change my attitude, and fast. It was easier said then done. But slowly, I'd felt myself getting better, and feeling better. It was a strange feeling. For so long, I'd been in a dark, black hole, that I'd forgotten what it was like to actually sit back and enjoy myself. Actually...I don't think I'd _ever_ known what it was like to enjoy myself. And I certainly wasn't enjoying myself here, but my outlook on life had been tweaked a little bit. I couldn't wait to get back to Zero. I'd done what he asked, and learned to try and be happier. I just hoped that maybe I could be the person that he wanted to be with. Not just the person he wanted to be with, but wanted certain qualities changed. No. I would be the person that he wanted and needed. Because he had his problems too. And now, he didn't have to worry about mine. It was a load off of my shoulders. Relationships were about give and take- or that's what one of the counselors had explained to me. Now, I wasn't oblivious to that fact before, but when someone else explained it...it was slightly more meaningful. And when I thought about it, I'd been doing an awful lot of taking. So now it was my turn to worry about him.

"Midori, are you all packed?" My main counselor, Hana, walked in with a manilla folder of paperwork.

I nodded, feeling great inside. Finally, after three months, I was leaving. I was leaving, and going back to Zero. I'd fully admitted to myself that I was irrevocably in love with him, and being away from him had only made the feelings stronger. "I just wanted to say thank you, Hana, for everything. It meant a lot, even if I was a little ungrateful at first," I picked up my suitcase, which was full of good luck presents from some friends that I'd made here.

Hana smiled. "I'm glad I got to see the beautiful young girl that you really can be," she said, ruffling my hair and giving me a quick hug. "Keep up your good work. As much as I'll miss having you around, I'd hate to see you back here, okay? Well, your guardian is here to pick you up, so whenever you're ready..."

The Chairman. The person who had gotten me into this mess. No, the person who had cared about me enough to do something about it. When I thought about it that way, it was pretty hard to be mad at him. "Of course," I said, giving a genuine smile. "Bye, Hana!"

"Good luck, sweetie, okay? You've really done a great job, you know. Just be careful about your anger. I know that's been tough on you."

"Yeah...of course," I said, just wanting to be out of there. Nag, nag, nag...I ran down to the lobby, where the Chairman was waiting. He looked different, though. As if he had a lot to tell me. A lot of bad news.

"Midori!" He said, seeing me. He ran up to me and gave me a good, long hug. "How's my favorite daughter?"

"D-daughter?" I asked, feeling a little emotional. "But I'm not...what about..."

He let go of me, and smiled. "The hospital told me you were doing so well...I didn't want to jeopardize anything by telling you earlier...but you know that I've been trying to adopt you- officially- for a while now. And...well...it's official now! That's the good news. I'm afraid that I have a whole list of bad news, though...We'll talk in the car, okay?" His smile had faded now, and he took my suitcase from me.

"Thanks," I mumbled, trying to look happy. It was hard though. "Can't wait to catch up..."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"Yuuki just got up and left?" I cried, practically ripping out of my seat belt. "That's- that's- insane...she..."

"Left with Kaname...and, I might add, a few of the other Night Class students. It turned out that...Yuuki was related to Kaname. That made her a vampire as well..."

"How's Zero taking it?" I asked, worried.

"Zero? Oh...he's fine. I don't even think he really cared. He's been...hanging out with Miss Gold an awful lot since you left."

A hollow feeling appeared in my chest. With...Tawny? What was he doing with Tawny? What had she told him? What had that witch done to him? My heart was fluttering nervously. "Tawny. Tawny? Why would he be hanging out with Tawny?" I was nervous. Any excitement I'd had of going back to the Academy was quickly put out.

"He...took it pretty hard when you left. I think that maybe he just needed someone...and she was there...I don't really know, Midori. But I'm sure they aren't dating. There are rumors going around, sure. But...Tawny isn't really Zero's type. So I wouldn't worry myself if I were you."

"Not be worried? How can I not be worried?" I cried , slamming a fist into the window, "She...she...took advantage of the situation...and she took him from me. Right out from under my nose. And I wasn't here to do anything about it."

"Midori, please calm down- I know it feels like the end of the world, but-" he didn't want me to go crazy in the car. I could tell he was afraid of me flying off the handle in here.

"I am calm!" I screamed, staring at my reflection in the rear-view mirror. My face had turned red. "I...just...this wasn't supposed to happen. I was supposed to come back...and everything was supposed to be all right," my voice had fallen to a hoarse whisper.

"And everything will be all right, Midori. I'm sure there's just a misunderstanding."

"I'm sure you're right," I said, although I doubted it. I just wanted to let him think that I was fine. It wasn't too late for him to turn the car around and bring me back to the hospital, although I seriously doubted he'd do that.

_Zero...what happened? Why are you with Tawny now?_

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

When I arrived back on campus, I was greeted by Yori.

"Yori!" I smiled, hugging her. She looked surprised, but she returned my hug.

"Don't worry...I knew you'd be upset about Tawny...so the Chairman said you could move back into my dorm. Now that...now that Yuuki is gone, I mean..." She looked at the ground. I felt bad for her. Yuuki had just completely abandoned her once best friend, just for some pretty boy. I was surprised that she'd done that for me, though. Or...maybe she just didn't like to be alone.

"Thanks," I said, honestly. "Is...it true? I mean...are Zero and Tawny...?" I felt a little lump form in my throat, but I kept my head.

"Yes...they're...an item now," Yori said sadly, "I'm really sorry. I thought for sure he'd wait for you...I don't know why on earth he chose to be with Tawny..."

"It's okay," I lied. "Whatever makes him happy. After I put my stuff away...do you want to go get a hot chocolate or something at the campus cafe?"

She looked surprised with my sudden boldness, but nodded with a smile. "Sure. Why not? I'd like that. I'd like that a lot."

Right now...I didn't want to worry about Zero. I would just get worked up about it. No. Right now, I'd try and be a friend to Yori. Because right now, she needed one.


	30. Some Inspiration

I have to say, of all of the things that I had to adjust to after going to the hospital, it was associating with people. When Yori and I went to the cafe, the oddest thing happened. I just clicked with her. All of that awkward uncomfortable tension that we'd once shared had vanished, and now we were talking like we'd been joined at the hip since birth. For the first half hour or so, I shared my experiences at the hospital, and she listened to me, and added some comments here and there. Then I let her talk, and she talked about her sisters, and her father, and her mother who disappeared one day. Yori had never seemed like the type of girl to have problems, but as I learned, apparently, she did. I should have been upset about Zero and Tawny, but I actually wasn't. Maybe talking to Yori and drinking hot tea, hot chocolate, and coffee for three hours was just a defense mechanism to distract me from what my heart was actually feeling. And if that was the case, then I felt bad, like I was just using Yori to distract me from pain. But as we talked more, I realized something. I actually liked Yori. No, not in the love kinda way, but in the friend kind of way. Before I'd gone to the hospital, I'd been a little rough on her...I hadn't given her a fair chance. Today, I realized that she wasn't nearly as annoying as I'd made her out to be. But maybe she was fighting her own battles about Yuuki leaving.

I finished my fifth warm beverage, and then took another bite of strawberry shortcake. It was my second piece. Sure, maybe I'd get fat, but whatever. I didn't eat like this every day. Nothing wrong with a little indulgence when you're feeling down, right? Yori seemed to be happier now. She was smiling and laughing, and so was I.

And then, Zero walked in, Tawny stuck to him like a fly to flypaper. She was clinging onto his arm with a huge, phony smile pasted on her face. All of that anger...the anger I'd tried so hard to control over the past few months surged up inside of me, threatening to break me open. It had been easy to forget about Zero and Tawny- at least when they weren't there. Now I found myself staring at the both of them, feeling such a hatred that could only be described as me wanting to skin Tawny alive, and pour lemon juice on her, then lock her in a box, cover it in oil, and burn it. That boyfriend stealing, dumb-blonde, American, slutty, dirty, disgusting, boy-loving, manipulative witch. I clenched the empty coffee mug in my hand, and began subconsciously squeezing it. Then, it suddenly flew out of my hand, slid across the table, fell off, and broke. Tawny's gaze immediately darted over to me. And then she smirked. I. Hated. Her. I don't care how many weeks of treatment the hospital put me through. It didn't matter. They could put me in for life, and I would never, ever, ever, like Tawny even a little bit. I made a growling noise in the back of my throat, which scared me a little bit.

Tawny suddenly sauntered over to me, dragging Zero behind her. He was staring at her with what was an unnatural interest. He didn't even give me a glance. Deep down, I wanted to cry, but I wouldn't cry. Not in front of her. I wouldn't let her see that she had won her game. "Midori!" She cried happily, "You're back!"

Yori looked just as uncomfortable around Tawny as I was. "Tawny, I really don't think that she wants to talk to you right now..."

I held up a hand to Yori and gave her a smile. "Yori, it's all right. It doesn't matter." I looked to Tawny, still having a secret wish to torture her until she screamed. However, I wouldn't let her see that she'd bothered me. "So, are you two together now?" I asked, as optimistically as possible.

My attitude seemed to surprise Tawny. Her eyes looked wider now, and I suspected that she was growing nervous that whatever her plan was, it wasn't working. "Yes! We are," she gushed, hugging Zero like he was just some, giant teddy bear. He still hadn't looked away from her. Yet at the same time, he wasn't saying anything. Why was he with her? What had happened? There were so many questions that I had.

"Well, we're going to go order milkshakes and cake. Well, he is anyways. I need to keep my figure, you know?" She gestured to her stick thin body, and danced over to a table where she was sure that I could see them.

I looked out the window that we were sitting by, pained. Someone was cleaning up my broken coffee cup now, and mumbling to themselves. "Hey Yori?" I asked quietly, "Can we leave now?"

"Oh...yeah. Of course. I understand," she said, leaving her half of the bill on the check the waiter had given us. I left my half as well, and I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"I'm sorry I made you leave early," I said quietly, sitting on my bed in my pajamas.

"It's okay, really. I understand. We were talking for a long time, anyways," she noted. She was standing in front of the mirror over our dresser, brushing her hair. After a long moment of silence, she said, "Thank you for not minding rooming with me. I know it's probably a pain for you. But...I miss having Yuuki around."

So I was just a replacement, then. Oddly, I was okay with it. "As long as I'm not with Tawny, I'm happy to be with you. And I'm sorry Yuuki just left you like that...has she contacted you since?"

Yori shook her head. "No, she hasn't. She's just disappeared. I can only hope that she's okay."

"If she's with Kuran, then I'm sure she is. He might be kind of scary, but he's definitely one who'd protect her to the death."

"I know that," Yori sighed, sitting down on her bed. "But she just...I couldn't say that we were best friends...but...she was always so cheerful. It made me feel better about myself, because her optimism was just contagious. Anyways...I thought you would have been much more upset about Tawny and Zero, am I wrong...?"

I smiled weakly. "You think I'm not upset? I'm dying inside. But you know what? There's nothing I can do about it. And if he wants to be with someone like Tawny, then who am I to try and come between them? Besides. No one wants a crazy girl."

"You were never crazy, Midori...just sick. But you weren't crazy. Craziness can't be cured. Sickness usually can. And now look at you. You aren't even showing that you're upset about your love getting with your enemy. The Midori that I knew would be furious right now."

"I don't want to take it out on you," I said quietly. "Besides. No matter how much I rant about it, it isn't going to change anything. It isn't going to make Tawny disappear, and it isn't going to make Zero care about me again."

"So you aren't even going to try, then? You're just going to let her take him?" Yori cried, with a boldness I never knew that she had.

"I'm just going to let her take him. If he didn't want to be with her, then he wouldn't be. But he is, so he must care about her. And who am I to come between them?"

"Midori, I don't care if you just got out of the hospital or not! You need to find your old self, and get him back. I know that Tawny has a reason for being with him. It isn't because she cares about him. So if you really loved him, you would try. The Midori I used to know wouldn't let him slip away from her with her enemy. You should have realized by now that Tawny obviously has some plan going on in her head. Only you can stop it."

I chewed on that for a minute. The more I thought about it...the more I realized that she was right. I wasn't going to let Tawny take him. Something wasn't right here, and I was going to find out just what it was.


	31. An Ally From An Enemy

I was patrolling the campus the next night, trying to "accidentally" run into Zero. So far I had proved unsuccessful in my goal, though. I sat down on the fountain, and stared at all of the loose change that would sit in there for the rest of...well, probably the rest of the year. Then, someone would probably climb in there and collect it all, easy funds for the school. It was wrong, I thought, to take people's dreams that would never come true, and use them for your own benefit. I picked a coin out of the pocket I'd sewn inside of my uniform jacket, and tossed it in. What I wished for, I'll never tell. Maybe I'm superstitious, but I'm perfectly fine with admitting that. It was a silly thing to do, wishing on a fountain, but it couldn't hurt. I watched my little coin sink to the bottom, and then stop.

I stood up. I needed to find Zero tonight, and talk to him. I wasn't going to try and steal him back from Tawny, not yet, but I needed to talk to him. I needed to know how he felt. If I never knew for sure, then I knew that I could never break them apart. I left the fountain behind me, and began to wander, head in the the clouds. I must have wandered around aimlessly for an hour before I finally spotted him. He was alone, standing by a tree, staring blankly at the Night Class dorms.

"Zero," I said softly, so he couldn't hear. I slowly approached him. When I was close enough, I said his name slightly louder to make sure that he heard me.

He looked at me, with empty looking eyes. "Hi."

"Hi," I said, taking another step closer. "Been a while, hasn't it?" I gave a weak smile.

"Tawny says I shouldn't talk with other girls." Woah, I didn't remember Tawny running his life. "She gets jealous." Zero's eyes seemed empty...dark...his pupils were absolutely huge.

"Why does it matter what she thinks? She doesn't own you," I stated, frustrated with how he was acting.

"I love Tawny." There wasn't even a hint of emotion in any of his words, as if he was just a computer, saying words that were programmed into him.

"What about...what happened to you? I left...and then I come back and you can't even apologize to me."

"What happened with you was a mistake. I used you so I could get to Tawny."

Something was seriously wrong here. I wasn't just saying that because I hate it when things don't go my way, either. "Zero...Tawny doesn't care about you. At all. She's just using you so she can hurt me."

"That's a lie."

"What's a lie is the love that you two apparently share. Tawny can't stand you...and I don't know what she did to you, but..."

"Zero, honey!" Tawny chirped, from somewhere nearby, "Let's go get something to eat before the cafe closes, okay?"

"That's Tawny," Zero said, matter-o-factly. Well, no duh. The she-witch approaches.

I rolled my eyes. "Well, I wouldn't want to mess with your date."

"Good. I love Tawny." He walked away, without even a simple goodbye. Jerk. .

I sighed. Whatever spell Tawny had cast on him, it was a good one. I didn't know why he was acting like this, unless it was his idea of a joke. That seemed pretty unlikely though.

Then I had one of my brilliant ideas (like they've worked so well before, right?). I would search through Tawny's things. I was sure to find some type of clue to why she was suddenly head over heels for Zero. At least, I hoped I'd find something. There was always that tiny, tiny chance that maybe they actually did like one another. I was willing to bet that wasn't the case, though. And I would risk everything to find out the truth.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Tawny's room was dark. The shades were pulled closed, and her room just creeped me out. In her garbage can, I noticed several pictures of her and Zero, that they'd apparently taken together as a happy couple. Photos in the trash. Well, my first suspicion was confirmed. Tawny didn't like Zero.

I knew how much trouble I'd be in if I got caught snooping around in here. Again, I was willing to take that chance. Now...if I was an evil teenage girl, where would I hide something I didn't want someone to find...? I checked all of the most obvious places first. Closet- nope. Under the bed- nothing but dust bunnies. Bedside table drawers- nothing but some notebooks. Under the pillows- nothing. I sat down on her bed. If she had done something wrong, she hadn't left any evidence behind. Unless...I began to search through her trash. There was nothing incredibly disgusting in there besides pictures of her with my Zero.

Then, the unthinkable happened. Well, okay, so it wasn't so unthinkable. After all, my luck is pretty rotten. The door opened, and I felt a pair of eyes on me. I swore to myself in my head, and slowly turned around. Who I saw though, wasn't who I was expecting to see. At all. In fact, I never expected to see him again.

"J-Jet?" I cried, shocked. "What are...what are you doing here?"

He looked embarrassed. "Uh...well...someone...told me about Tawny and Zero...and I...I wanted to talk to Tawny about it."

Another suspicion confirmed. Jet = not normal. Why on Earth would he want Tawny back?

"If you want your girl back, it would do you well to cooperate with me."

"You mean...you'd be willing to do that? Even after I was a total jerk to you?"

"My enemy is my friend when my enemy's girlfriend has stole my boyfriend."

"Huh?"

"Just nod your head, Jet, and help me look for anything suspicious, okay?"

He nodded. Good boy. Good boy.


	32. True Love

"Define 'suspicious,'" Jet said, rummaging through Tawny's drawers. He was probably only in it for a view of her panties, but I'd let it go for now.

"Anything that wouldn't normally be in Tawny's room," I groaned. How could one boy have so much stupid? I was going more carefully through her closet for a second time, checking pockets.

"Well...uh...unless Tawny's taking some medication I've never known about...this shot thingy is kinda unusual..." I turned around, to see Jet holding up an empty syringe. He was looking at it strangely, like he was trying to figure out what it was. I hopped over to him, and plucked it from his hands.

"What the...what was she doing with a syringe?" I asked, talking more to myself than Jet. I twisted it around in my hands. "Jet, can you see if there's anything else where you found this?"

He nodded, and returned to going through her drawers. It was an ordinary syringe, there weren't any labels on it or anything. The only way I knew it had even been used was that the inside had a few drops of a liquid clinging onto the sides. What had she done with this? I had a feeling I already knew, though. She'd stuck it in Zero.

"Midori..."

"Not now, Jet, I'm thinking."

"Midori!" Jet repeated, more persistent now.

"Just a second," I said, trying to retrieve my previous train of thought.

"Tawny's coming!" Jet hissed, and I suddenly snapped into action. I tucked the syringe in my pocket, grabbed Jet by the arm, and we ran out of Tawny's room and down the hallway. Jet then turned around and bolted inside of a closet, so Tawny wouldn't see him.

"Hey, Tawny," I said, smiling nervously.

She looked at me, nose wrinkled. "Um, yeah. Don't talk to me." She pushed past me, and strolled into her room. I sighed in relief. She hadn't noticed anything wrong. I opened the door to the closet, and pulled Jet out. "Did you find anything else?" I demanded to know.

"Actually...yeah," he said, pulling out a small vile of liquid, identical to what had been in the syringe. I grabbed it from him.

"Jet...I think I know what's going on here," I said, taking the syringe out of my pocket.

"Good...because I don't."

"Why the hell are you so stupid?" I cried, but suddenly caught myself. I didn't think my anger problems would ever go away entirely. But they were manageable. "Never mind. It's not important- but it is obvious. Tawny injected this stuff into Zero, and I'm guessing it worked like some type of love potion, and made Zero completely in love with her. She did this to upset me, of course, not because she actually likes him..."

"Thank God," Jet sighed, relieved. "So...all you have to do is inject him with that stuff and make him like you again, right?"

"No," I shook my head. "Not right. I need Zero to like me for me. Not because I filled him up with some screwed up love potion."

"So...what do we do?" Jet asked, getting irritated.

"I...don't know. I really don't know. I think I'll do some research and see what I can find. Maybe there's a cure...or something."

"There better be..." Jet sighed. "I just want Tawny back."

"And I want Zero back. But...the only way to do that is through patience." Something I didn't have a whole lot of. But I was being careful, because I didn't want to explode at Jet, who was proving very useful.

"Are you sure that we'll get them back?"

"Well...as soon as Tawny realizes her plan isn't working...I suspect that she'll just dump Zero. I know that she can't stand him, and it isn't like they'll get married. And...the whole reason she's doing this is because you got expelled."

"So...then if I showed her I was here...do you think she'd dump him?" Jet asked, hopeful.

"I...don't know Jet, maybe. But still...that only solves half of the problem. Zero would still be infatuated with her, even if she dumped him, I think."

"Well, it solves my half of the problem, so I could really care less what happens to him. Later Midori. Thanks for all of your help." Jet smirked, and went over to Tawny's door, and knocked. I groaned. This wasn't going in the direction I'd hoped.

When the door opened, Tawny was all over him. It made me sick. Jet had used me to get his way. And I was still stuck with my problem. I looked away as the pair began to make out in the middle of Tawny's doorway. Just perfect. Just perfect. Then I noticed Zero walking down the hall with a bouquet of flowers. For Tawny, I imagined. Then he stopped as he saw Jet and Tawny.

"What are you doing with her?" Zero cried, running up to Jet and punching him in the face. Tawny looked shocked, and then horrified as she realized that she'd caused this. "Are you all right, Tawny?" Zero asked, emotionless.

"What did you do that for?" Tawny screamed, rushing to Jet's side. "Zero-kun, get lost. I don't need you anymore. We're through."

The flowers fell to the floor, but he didn't change his robotic attitude. "But...I love you, Tawny."

"I don't care. Now get lost...and let Jet and I here finish!" She kissed Jet's cheek, and sat in his lap.

"But Tawny..."

"Get away from me, you creepy moron!" Tawny said, kicking Zero in the knee. He flinched, but I could tell that because of the potion's influence, his heart was hurting much, much more.

"If you want him to go away, reverse this stupid hold you have on him," I ordered, stepping out of the shadows.

Tawny glared at me. "If I knew how, I would. But I don't, so ha. It's not like I'm losing anything from it."

"Tawny..." I swallowed, "You...fix him."

"There's nothing I can do about it," Tawny snapped, exhausted with me, "He loves me. Oh well. Boo-hoo. If you want him fixed, do it yourself." She abruptly returned to making out with Jet.

"Zero...come on. She isn't worth it," I said softly, grabbing his arm. He didn't make any attempt to brush me away, but he continued looking at Tawny, even as I dragged him down the hallway. "I love Tawny," he insisted. "I love her."

"No you don't," I mumbled, pulling him outside. I shook him by the shoulders. "Earth to Zero! I know that the real you is somewhere in there...the you I love. The Tawny-hating one."

"I could never hate Tawny." Argh. This boy's words were going to make me sick.

"You do hate Tawny, though!" I protested weakly, "You've always hated her, and you used to like me, remember? Remember Lily? And the barn?" I was desperately trying to break through to him. This always seemed to work in the movies, after all. "The...the kiss? Our kiss?" It was my last chance- the last memory that I thought might be able to get through to him. "You...you said you wanted me to be happy, remember?" I choked out, trying to hold back the tears that had been trying to come much more often lately. "Well...I'm...I'm not happy, Zero. I'm not happy unless you're yourself. Please. I know that somewhere inside of you is the Zero that I used to know...so where is he? Please Zero...I don't care if you don't love me, I just want you to be yourself again!"

No response. His eyes were still dull and black, like a doll's eyes.

"Zero, come on!" I screamed, slapping him across the face. "Please, wake up! Don't let her win! She can't...she can't win! She'll never love you! Ever! But Zero...please, if you can hear me...I do! I do, and I'm sorry that I couldn't have been here when you needed me the most...when Yuuki left, when...when...Zero please just come back to yourself! I can't take it anymore. I love you, Zero, and I need this to get through to you!"

"I love Tawny."

"No! No! No! No!" I screamed, letting the tears flow freely now, "You don't love Tawny. You never will! She...she stuck a syringe in your arm! She made you love her! But...I've always loved you. Even when you didn't know it, I loved you. So please, Zero. Please...just...wake up. You can't let her win. Please, don't let her win."

His eyes were still dull and glassy, and his expression was unreadable. I fell to my knees. It was hopeless. It was over. No matter how hard I tried, I still lost in the end. Because that was the way my luck worked. I was now, quite literally, invisible to the person who mattered the most of me. He could see me, but he didn't know me. He didn't recognize me. It was as if he was looking through me, looking for the me that he'd never see again.

Suddenly, he pulled out his Bloody Rose, and held it to his head. "If I can't have the most beautiful girl alive, then what do I live for?"

"No! Stop it!" I shouted, smacking the gun from his hand until it landed about ten meters from us. "I hate you this way! You're like a zombie! Please just freaking wake up already!" I was angry now, and my voice had grown about a hundred times louder. I wasn't begging anymore, now I was angry, and demanding. "Stop being so selfish and look at me already!" I sounded like a spoiled five year old who was demanding ice cream. "I love you, you idiot, and I don't want to be invisible! I want you to see me, instead of Tawny! She dumped you! She isn't the only person on the planet that matters, you know!" I hugged him, and began to sob into his chest. "You matter, too. And you can't let her win."

Suddenly, he hugged me back. "You can stop your crying, you know."

I jumped back from him, "W-what?" His eyes had returned to normal now, and he had a smirk on his face.

"I thought you should know that I was free from that stupid thing Tawny did to me for a while now. Actually, when she dumped me, I think whatever hold she had on me broke. I just wanted to see how far you would go." He ruffled my hair. "I'm just glad to see that you're still the same."

I paused, mouth hanging wide open. "You...freaking...jerk!" I screamed, crying harder, but smiling at the same time, "I hate you!" I was relieved, and angry, and happy all at the same time. "Never, ever do that to me again!" I cried.

Zero hugged me even tighter than he had the first time. "I'm sorry, but it was just too much fun. Seeing you all worked up like that."

"You're terrible! You're awful, and I hate you!" I said jokingly, but I was serious in saying that what he did was terrible and awful.

"I know. But I'm not going to change any time soon, you know," he whispered in my ear.

"Good. Because I don't want to wind up with some Tawny-loving fanboy again, you hear?"

"Loud and clear," he said softly, and he kissed me on the lips. And everything was perfect. From the beautiful, full moon at midnight, to the soft thunder in the distance.

THE END


	33. Epilogue

So, in the end everything worked out for me. I guess the saying "Things will get worse before they get better" really is true after all. After we told the Chairman about Tawny's love potion...he expelled her, and sent her back to America. I guess we won't be seeing any more of her. I almost feel bad for her- almost. Because I don't think she'll ever be seeing Jet again, either. When the Chairman discovered he'd come back, he threatened to call the police on him. Jet took off at record speed, without even saying goodbye to Tawny. Well, bad things do happen to bad people occasionally.

My scars are almost healed now- the ones on my leg. It's still there, and I think it always will be there, as a reminder of worse times. At the same time, it serves as a reminder that I survived, because I was stronger than my demons. So, yes, in the end, I won. Happy endings rarely happen, and I never expected to get a happy ending for me. Maybe it was to make up for all of the bad things I went through. But I'm just happy to be with people I love. I'm graduating next month, and even though I don't have plans to even attempt going to a University, I do have something going for me. I've decided to become a psychiatrist, in honor of everyone at the hospital who helped me save me from myself. There's nothing more I want then to spread the feeling that was given to me. Even to those who might not appreciate it at first.

My anger problem is getting better, too. It's far from gone, but it's not nearly as bad as it used to be. I've faded into the background again, and pretty much everyone has forgotten about all of my little scuffles last year. Now, I sort of appreciate being invisible again. Because I'm not totally invisible. I'm important to those who love me.

And in the end, I realized that it isn't about being noticed, or being popular. It's about being noticed by those who are truly worth your time and love.


End file.
